The Seven Sassy Demigods
by DivergentDemigods21
Summary: The Seven Answer your questions, in a stupid yet funny sassy way.
1. To The Girls:Perf Boyfriend

**To the 7, Thalia (And Nico): Who is the perfect boyfriend? - Elaine**

Annabeth: Percy

Piper:Sorry Jason…Percy

Leo:Can someone say REJECTION

Jason:SHUT UP LEO

Hazel:Umm, well franks sweet and nice and…

_Frank:Just say it and get it over with_

_Hazel:Percy, but your close second_

_Leo:REJECTION_

_Frank:Haven't you notice no one said your name yet, Leo_

_Jason:Guys be nice, *smiles evilly* its nico's turn_

Piper:You see Jason this is why you're not the perfect boyfriend, you smile weirdly

Leo:Dude you just got dissed

Thaila:Can we continue, Percy he treats Annabeth alright

Percy:That's four for persassy

Annabeth:I'd like to change my vote

Persassy:Too late

Annie:Oh my gods, Percy really… Oh MY GODS IM GONNA KILL YOU

Sexyleo:Hey I want to change my name too

HazelNut:Can we please stop change the names, it's getting confusing. IM DATEING FRANK GET OVER IT LEO

Persassy and Leoissexxy:Fine

Jason:Nico, it's your turn

Nico** Bi** Angelo:I don't see why I have to

Thaila:Stop dodging the question

Nico **Bi** Angelo:Has anyone notice that my name is…

Leoissexxy:MY TURN

_Frank:Why does he get to go_

_Annie Valdez:He doesn't, Leo….. LEO _

_Persasy:HA HA*PULLS OUT RIPTIDE* HA_

_Leo:Whoa dude_

Piper:Aww, why can't you ever do that Jason

_Jason:SO WHAT PIPER!_

_Piper:See you have too big of a temper to be the the perfect boyfriend_

_Jason:Nico still hasn't answered yet_

_Leoissexxy:MY TURN_

_Mrs Thaila Valdez:okay go… YOUR ASKING FOR IT VALDEZ _

_Leo:ME_

_Frank:YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE AN GIRLFRIEND_

_Leo:BUT I HAVE FANGIRLS, THAT'S MORE THEN YOU FRANK_

_Everyone in Hephaestus cabin:__BURN_


	2. To The Gods: Fav Child

**To The Gods: Favorite Child-Kenzie**

Poseidon: My son persassy, he's the best of course

Persassy: Thank you Posassden

Athena: Zeus tell your retard brother and nephew that, that was the worst pun in history ever

Annabeth: Mooooom, You promised to be nicer

Athena: I lied, Btw you're not my favourite Malcom is.

Hephaestus and Leo: REJECTION

Athena/Annabeth: SHUT UP

Piper: Well, I think we all know whose favourite mom is

Drew: Yup I think we do

Aphrodite: Neither, Selina Is

Drew/Piper: WHY

Aphrodite: CAUSE, SHE AUCTALY LIKED HER BEAUTY AND WASN'T SUCH A BETCH

Drew/Piper: *Cries*

Hephaestus and Leo: REJECTION

Aphrodite /Drew/Piper: SHUT UP

Hades: Bianca

Nico: maybe someone not dead

Hades: Hazel

Nico: WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME

Hades: CAUSE YOU RUNAWAY FROM YOUR SECRET

Nico:

Hades: Tell Them Nico,*sips pomegranate juice*Tell them *puts on shades*

Nico: *Inhales** sit down in rocking chair* Gather around children

*Everyone sits down around rocking trees*

Athena: how is it possible that this many people can fit in such a small room?

Zeus: SHUT UP DAUGHTER

Nico: My secret is...

Everyone: * eyes widen *

Nico: I'm, I'm… IM A BROWNIE

Percy: SOO AM I

Frank: ME TO, RAINBOW DASH OR FLUTTERSHY

Leo: I Prefer Apple jack

Jason: This… this was the secret; I thought you were going to tell everyone you were ga-

Nico: *Hit Jason with baseball bat**puts in trash bag*throws into the ocean*

Nico: Rainbow dash


	3. To the Guys: Fav MLP

**To The Guys: Favorite MLP**

**Percy: RAIRITY, she is so sassy**

**Frank: I beg to differ, Rainbow dash is the sassiest of all the MLP **

**Percy: Please she doesn't even have that good of hair**

**Leo: Please Gurl, Have you not seen Fluttershy's, it's so pink and curly no one can beat that, Right Piper**

**Piper: uuh, sure**

**Percy: But Rarity has the only purple hair, pinkie pie has pink hair too. *Puts on MLP shades***

**Annabeth: I can't believe there having this conversation**

**Jason: Well I think Derpy Is really cool**

**Everyone: *Gasp***

**Leo: I think it's time for you to go**

**Jason: But I-**

**Percy: Go Jason, you're not a real brownie, you're a wannabe punk**

**Frank: Mmmh**

**Nico: I agree with Percy**

**Jason: *Fangirls* *Runs around Argo ll screaming pernico***

**Leo: Is he okay**

**Jason: PERNICO FOREVA**

**Percy: What's that?**

**Jason: It you and n-**

**Nico: *Gets Truck* Drives over Jason* Stabs him with butter knife * Puts in garbage bag full of Garbage cause that what he is* Throws into Ocean***

**Hazel: WHY CANT WE HAVE NORMAL BOYFRIENDS AND BROTHERS**


	4. To Leo: Have you told Percy yet

**To Leo: Have you told Percy about Calypso yet-Idonthaveanameimagust**

Leo: Schist

Percy: You met her

Annabeth: * Throws knife above Percy and Leo's head* don't speak of that little BETCH

Piper: Wait, Who's Calypso. Should I ship them, I ship them I'll go make T-shirts

Jason: I think your taking this a little too far

Piper: * Makes Caleo T-Shirts* Shut up Jason there my OTP

Jason: You don't even know who she is

Piper: THE POWER OF OTP IS STRONG ENOUGH THAT I DON'T NEED TO KNOW WHO SHE IS JASON

Jason: . . .

Frank: As long as he stops flirting with Hazel

Leo: Who's Says i'm stopping, * Play Spanish Guitar for hazel*

Calypso: WHAT ARE YOU DOING

Annabeth: WHY IS THAT BETCH HERE

Calypso: Hermes gave me a computer thingy to do this

Calypso: AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING LEO

Leo: It's not what it looks like

Percy: *Comes in shirtless,with wet hair and six pack* Oh hey Calypso

Jason: How did you even do that so fast?

Calypso: Hi Percy. *twirls hair like a beautiful goddess*

Annabeth: LEO BLOCK HER

Calypso: Don't do it

Leo: you were just flirt-

Calypso: So were you

Annabeth: BLOCK THE BETCH NOW LEO

Leo: But she's my-

Annabeth: *THROWS KNFIE CLOSE BY LEO'S NECK* BLOCK HER NOW

Leo: Sorry

Calypso: WHY YOU LITTLE-

Hazel: So this is what the 21 century is like.

* * *

**So I did this as request someone made, if you guys have any requests just let me know**

**-Divergentdemigods**


	5. To Coach Hedge: Demigod Cupcakes

To Coach Hedge: Demigod cupcakes- fromthisisarandomuserpersonandstuff

Coach Hedge: Percy, he's a blueberry muffin, with extra blue

Percy: Is that an insult or a complement

Coach Hedge: And piper is a Cupcake with too much pink fondant, that it tastes disgusting, oh and with a lot of strawberries

Piper: I am not a pink cupcake, am I?

Leo: Sadly it's true *Puts on shades *

Coach Hedge; Oh a Leo is a brunt cupcake, with lots and lots of brunt batches

Leo: That is not true

Piper: But it is *flips hair all sassy like *

Coach Hedge: those hades kids are banana bread muffins,

Hazel: Why banana bread

Coach hedge: did you forget the time you two had a banana party

Nico: That was fun

Hazel: Gosh, I didn't know kidnaping people and forcing them to eat bananas was so much fun

Frank: YOU WHAT

Hazel: Schist

Coach Hedge: Frank is a red cupcake with lots of fire around it, because it was awesome

Leo: How does that make sense?

Coach Hedge: SHUT UP CUPCAKE

Percy; so who did you kidnaped at your party

Nico: That's for me to know and you to find out

Jason; THAT HE WOVES YO-

Nico: *Opens portal to the underworld underneath Jason* as we were

Coach hedge; Oh and Jason's a lemon cupcake because he's blonde

Jason: *fly's up from underworld wearing Pernico T-shirt* I'm not that blonde

Nico: How did you doesn't matter. *Swings coach hedges bat*puts Jason in chains* throws into underworld portal*

Annabeth: *Coughs* what about me *Coughs*

Coach Hedge; Oh and Annabeth is a Ten foot tall cake with the realistic bird on top of it

Leo: Now how is THAT FAIR?

Frank: *puts on shades* it is what it is 


	6. To The Hades Kids: Banana Partys

**To Nico/Hazel: Any Banana Party's Lately-Ilovepercyjackson101**

Nico: Well yes, acutly we just had it five minutes ago

Hazel: He won't be getting out of there for a while

Nico/Hazel:*Laughs*

Frank: Guys I'm scared

Leo: Be a man Frank

Hazel: Yeah, here Leo have a Banana

Leo: Why thank you hazel *unpeels banana*

Jason: *Barges in room*smacks banana out of hand*

Nico: How did he get in here, HAZEL YOU SAID YOU TIED HIM UP

Hazel: I did really tight

Jason: Dont eat it man they'll tie you up put you in a room and force you to eat it while they dance to crappy music

Hazel: Don't listen to him, eat it

Percy: HES TELLING THE TRUTH MAN, ITS FREKY WHAT THOSE KIDS DO

Leo:

Hazel: EAT IT

Percy/Joan: DONT EAT IT

Calypso: Eat it

Annabeth: I THOUGHT YOU BLOCKED HER

Leo: I did, how did you

Calypso: Just eat it Leo, I have my ways

Leo: *Eats banana* see guys it wasn't so bad

Piper: He's a dead man

Leo: *Faints*

In a different room

Leo: * wakes up * whoa were am I *here's crappy music*

Hazel and Nico: *Dances to crappy music*

Hazel: Hess awake

Nico: here *Hands Banana* Eat it

Leo: But I-

Nico: EAT IT

Leo: NO

Hazel/Nico: EAT IT

Leo: *Takes Banana*Eats slowly*watches Hades kids dance to crappy music*

Leo: I shouldn't have eaten the Banana

Hazel/Nico: *Laughs while eating bananas and dancing *

Hades: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have normal kids for a change


	7. To The Ship: Who runs the ship

**Percabeth, Jasper and Frazel- Who runs the relationship? - Lady Musicz**

Percy: well I of course do

Annabeth: No you don't, you'd be lost without me

Percy: no I wouldn't

Annabeth: you asked me what you should wear and what to eat every single day

Percy: . . .

Annabeth: Yes, live in your pathetic shame

Leo: *Goes on fire * BURN

Jason: I thought we were Jiper

Piper: We were, I changed it cause it sounded ugly, now go get me a frapichino

Jason: Yes Mam'

Piper: To answer your question me

Jason: *is dressed as waiter* that's cause you always CHARMSPECK ME *Hands frapichino*

Piper: No one cares what you have to say Jason, *charmspecks*now go get me my pink nail polish

Leo: BURN

Frank: Hazel

Leo: you didn't even try, Man... You're not even a man for not trying

Frank: What am is supposed to do *whispers* she scares me

Leo: you're like a 6 foot tall ape; go show her whose boss

Frank: Yeah, Yeah I will

In another room

Frank: Hazel I run this relationship, Not You

Hazel: *Creepily turns head* what did you say

Frank:... Im in charge...

Hazel: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT

Frank: Your scareing me

Hazel: Good, YOU WOULD BE LOST WITHOUT ME,

Frank: I'm sorry, I'm sorry please don't hurt me

Hazel: Too late *Traps frank in a block of diamonds*opens portal to underworld*pushes Frank into the underworld*

Hazel: I'll get you when I feel like it

Leo: BURRRRRNNNNNNN

Leo: I'm glad I don't have a girlfriend

Calypso: EXCUSE ME

Leo: Schist


	8. To PercyNico: On the top or Bottem

**To Nico and Percy: Are you top or bottom? (Nicercy or Perncico?)-LiteBryte**

Percy: I don't get it, on top or bottom of what

Annabeth: A bed Percy, A bed

Percy: But Me and Nico don't share a bed?

Annabeth: It's Official everyone I'm dating A RETARD

Percy: *Holds riptide* where is this retard and where can I kill him

Annabeth: *Face plant*

Nico: Jason where are you *holds baseball bat* come out come out where ever you are

Percy: ANNNAAABEEETTTHHH, I searched up what Perncico and Nicerrecy was. Did you know Nicerrecy means someone in love with themselves?

Annabeth: That Narcissist Percy

Percy: Oh and did you know the Perncico means *Whispers to Annabeth meaning*

Annabeth: That Porn Percy

Percy: Oh

In a different room

Nico: I WILL FIND YOU JASON AND KILL YOU

Jason: *Hides in Pipers closet*

Piper: He's in the closet

Nico: Whaaaaaat, I thought he was straight

Percy: Yeah, when did he become Gay?

Annabeth: RETARDS EVERYWHERE

Jason: *Comes out of the closet* Oh hey guys

Hazel: Guys look he just came out

Jason: Yeah I just did?

Frank: Look man, we'll always think of you the same way

Percy: Yeah, if you have anything to say just say it

Jason: . . .

Annabeth: They think your Gay

Jason: WHY DOSE THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS, EVERYWERE I GO EVERYONE THINKS IM GAY. IS IT BEACUSE OF MY UNMANLY BLONDENESS

Leo: Is it the way that he runs scared?  
Or that he's socially impaired?

Frank: Or that he only likes to tinkle in the woods?

Percy: His Isolation is Conformation Of his desperation for healing hugs

Hazel: When did this become a musical?

Frank, Leo, Percy: *Plays Instruments*so he's a bit of a fixer upper  
But we know what to do  
the way to fix this fixer upper  
is to fix him up with you

Room changes

Piper:*In Wedding gown* How the Hades did this happen

Jason: *In fancy suit* I have no idea

Hazel: I'm guessing me and Annabeth are the Bride maids

Drew: I'm here too

Piper: I NEVER INVITED YOU

Coach hedge: Do you piper McLean take Jason grace as your husband

Piper: Sure

Coach Hedge: Do you Jason Grace take Piper McLean as your dreadful wife

Piper: I'm not dreadful

Jason: I guess

Coach Hedge: I now pronounce you husband and wife

Jason: Did we just get married

Percy: Annnnaaabbbeeettthhh, I think I know what Nicerrecy means

Annabeth: What

Percy: It means to be nice

Annabeth: KILL ME NICO, KILL ME RIGHT NOW AND YOU CAN HAVE HIM

* * *

**I Honestly dont know where i was going with this soo yeah.i hoped youd enjoed this whatever this is lol.**


	9. To Random: If you could be anything

**To the 7, the Stolls, Thalia, Nico, &amp;Coach Hedge and anybody else you want to show up randomly: If you could be anything or anyone, what would you be?-7thSeven**

Frank: You're kidding me right, I AM ANYTHING, I AM THE QUESTION THE QUESTION IS ME, And I CAN BE ANYTHING

Hazel: Calm down Frank

Frank: Yes Hazel

Hazel: I would be a Dark Horse

Annabeth: Hmmm,

Percy: ME

Annabeth: You have to be something else other then yourself

Percy: Myself?

Annabeth: I change my mind; i want to be calypso so I can get away from the retard

Percy: ANNNNAAAABBBBEETTTHHH, Where Is The Retard I Need To Kill Him For Stalking You.

Piper: Jason would be Augustus Waters and I would be Hazel Grace Lancaster

Jason: But I don't –

Piper: I am your wife Jason what I say goes now go get me Latte

Jason: Yes My lady

Coach Hedge: Hmmm, Die

Nico: So Death itself

Coach Hedge: Yes

Nico: Thantos

Leo: Frank so * starts singing* I CAN BE ANYTHING, NEVER PUSH THE LIMT

Room starts changing

Piper: * Covers Leos mouth* Continue *duct tapes Leo's mouth*

The Stolls: Racoons

Clarisse: Jessica Rakoczy, Cuase she's AWESOME And not an excuse for an Ares Kid like Frank

Frank: I am not an excuse

Clarisse: You're scared of your girlfriend who's like two years younger than you.

Frank: But she's scray, you haven't been to one of her banana parties

Thaila: Avril Lavigne, they can't possibly that bad

The 7: THEY ARE

Leo: They feed you until you throw up

Piper: Sometimes they dangle you above the underworld

Percy: And the music, I want be calypso so I can never have to witness that again

Piper: Nooooo, i want to be her

Calypso: WHY DOSE EVERYONE WANT TO BE ME. Don't be confused I'm flattered at how much you all love, I mean no one is as Perf as me *flips hair all sassy like*puts on shades*

Percy: Please you're not sassy enough to be her

Piper: Hey, at least I'm not a retard

Percy: Again with this Retard person. At least everyone loves me since I don't use my POWERS

Piper: I DO NOT USE MY POWERS FOR PEOPLE TO LOVE YOU LOVE ME

Everyone: Yes your highness we love you *bows to pipers feet*

Percy: Just go back to your room and do your dollies hair and cry about how Jason can never be Augustus Waters*puts on shades*

Leo: AND PERCY WINS THE SASS OFF 21,988 TIMES IN A ROW

Percy: That's Right, That's Right

* * *

**sORRY If this wasnt that funny. and for the bad grammer but sass on everyone,Sass On**


	10. To Calypso: COFFE

**To Calypso: Ever had a Frapichino-Hi**

Calypso: What is this Frap-i-chi-no you speak of?

Piper: *dose hand springs* five cartwheels* and summer salts into the room* YOE'VE NEVER HAD A FRAPACINO

Calypso: Well no, I have been too busy being STUCK ON A ISLAND FOR THREE THOUSANDS YEARS

Piper: Touché

Leo: *Makes Frapichino* *hands to calypso* Here try it

Calypso: Thank you Leo *Takes Frapichino* OHMIGODS *Gags at taste* SOMEONE GET ME WATER OR BETTER YET MOUTH WASH THIS IS AWFUL NOT THAT SOMEONE BURN MY TUNG OFF PLEASE

Leo: it's not that bad

Calypso: GODS I JUST TASTED TARTURUS, NO EVEN WORSE THEN THAT

Leo: I worked really hard on that

Calypso: Leo, stick to fixing things cause your dream of being a chief just went down the trash

Leo: *sobs* YOU ARE SOO MEAN *Sobs*

Calypso: it's called sass, get used to it *flips hair all sass like*puts on shades*

Annabeth: I feel like these aren't addressed to the seven anymore

Piper: You need to try Jason's his are the

Jason: On it *Makes best Frapichino ever* here

Calypso: *tries* THIS IS AMAZING, can you cook Italian

Jason; *has Italian mustache* Yeseerria

Jason: * Make Italian Pizza* *gives to everyone* Do you like my pizzeria *Has Italian accent*

Everyone: IT'S LIKE HEAVEN IN MY MOUTH

Jason: Thank youerria

Nico: Just because you say erria at the end of every sentence does not make you Italian

Jason: but it doeserria

Nico: NO it doesn't

Jason: Well someone needs to embrace the Italian side, and since I'm the only one who can cook I get to be italinerria

Nico: That's it I Challenge you Jason Grace to a cook off

Jason: Could I be frencherria

Nico: Yes, be prepared to get your ass whooped THE KING OF COOKING

The next day

Leo: In Announcer voice* it's a beautiful day for a cook off isn't it Percy

Percy: *In announcer voice* Why yes it is Leo. Today we have Jason Grace cooking something French vs. Nico Di Angelo cooking something Italian

Leo: And we have our judges Calypso, Annabeth Chase, Coach Hedge and Frank Zhang

Coach Hedge: *Swings bat* DIE

Percy: What lovely people

Piper: You better win grace

Jason: *in cooking suit with French mustache*speck with French accent* WE

Nico Di Angelo: *In black cooking suit with Italian mustache* *spaces with no accent* your goanna lose

Calypso: minus ten points to Nico Di Angelo for terrible accent

Nico: that is not fair

Calypso: WHAT I SAY GOSE

Nico/Jason: *starts cooking* *puts a bunch of stuff in bowls*mix things together*cooks a bunch of stuff*

Percy: It's time for judges to try

Leo: Frist up calypso

Calypso: *tastes Jason* It's like eating Elysium and Heaven all at once *tastes Nico* It's like I'm eating Hell…but somehow in a good freaking tasty way. My point goes to Jason

Jason: we

Nico: THAT'S NOT EVEN FRENCH

Jason: we we?

Percy: ANNNNNNNAAAAAABBBBBEEETTTTHHHH

Annabeth: What Percy

Percy: It's your turn

Annabeth: *Taste food*EATING NICOS FOOD IS LIKE READING THE LAST CHAPTERS OF TFIOS OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN *Cries* my point goes to Jason

Piper: Allaient battre vos ânes désolé, les chiennes . _hey à tous ceux qui scherced cette place et le lire. histoire drôle. pendant la classe, nous lisons à propos de la virginie, quand j'ai lu le mot que je lis Virgina et je riais si fort que je suis entré dans tant de peine. de toute façon revenir à l'histoire. Deivergentdemigods_

Nico:Now that's French

Leo: Coach's turn

Coahc Hedge: *tastes food* DIE

Leo: So a tie

Coach Hedge: Die

Leo: okay a tie

Percy: FRANNNNNKKKKKKYYYY, It's your turn

Frank: Nico

Leo: but you didn't even

Frank; NICO

Leo: Okay

Percy: The winner is Jas-

Hazel: *Gives death stare* *Holds banana*

Percy: NICO

Jason: That is not fair everyone liked mines better

Frank: but everyone is afraid of Hazel so suck it up buttercup or go cry to yourself in the mirror about your ugly hair

Jason: that was really mean, *starts singing* we used to be best buddies

Frank: we were never friends I hated you from day one, so shut up

Jason: . . .

Frank: How's rejection *puts on shades* that's right betches I got sass


	11. To All: Fav Person

**To Everyone: Favorite person on Argo ll excluding yourself, boyfriend and girlfriend-tswift1fan**

Leo: Dam gurl, whats with all the rules

Thaila: Dam *smirks*

Leo: Hazel

Annabeth: Hazel

Frank: Not Jason, Hazel

Percy: Not retard

Thaila: dose even know what a retard is

Annabeth: NO, and it drives me crazy that he doesn't know, he talks about killing the retard and it's so hard

Thaila: I don't know whether to laugh or feel bad for you

Jason: Hazel

Piper: Hazel

Thaila: why is everyone say hazel

Frank: *whispers* she's scary

Thaila: huh

Percy: just say her and get over it

Thaila: Please like I'm going to say a seconded class peasant is my favorite

Hazel: *rises from ashes*

Leo: she's hereee

Thaila: That's the little girl you're scared of, I've seen trees scary her then you

Hazel: Takes one to no one

Leo: BURN

Hazel and Thaila: SHUT UP FLAME BOY

Thaila: Puh lease, I'm not the one hiding the dark sunshine

Hazel: why don't you just go back to your dumb immortal life, and spend the rest of knowing you've never kissed a guy

Thaila: Ill rejerter that insult once your forty and old and having a mid-life crises, and I'm still young and hot

Hazel: . . . *whispers* I just lost

Thaila: what, did you just lose, you can't beat me emo princess. I AM THE SASS QUEEN NOT EVEN HADES CAN BEAT ME *Puts on shades all sassy like*

Leo: *Call Firefighter percy* Percy come down here quik

Percy: Why

Leo: CAUSE HAZEL JUST GOT BRUNED

Percy and Leo: OHHHHH

Hazel: How dare you *opens underworld portal* *doesn't work* hey what happened

Hades: I took away that power

Hazel: What, WHYYYYY!

Hades: I WORK HARD TO BE SASSY,EVERYONE N THIS FAMILY IS SASSY,EVEN PRESOPHONE AND DEMETER ARE SASSY,WE NEVER LOST ONE SASS CONTEST THEN YOU LOSE TO THE TREE GIRL,HAZEL WE ARE DISSAPOINTED IN YOU,RIGHT NICO

Nico: Huh, oh yeah WE ARE VERY DISSAPIONTED IN YOU

Hazel: . . .

Frank: Do you know what this means,

Leo: WE DONT HAVE TO BE SCARED ANYMORE, MY FAVORITE PERSON IS THAILA *grins at Thaila*

Frank: IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Percy: THANK YOU HADES, THANK YOU SOO MUCH

Piper: I've been dying to say this for a long time, HAZEL, YOUR A BETCH, IVE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY IN MY LIFE

Annabeth: Hey, Hazel I WANT MY BOOKS BACK YOU HAVENT RETURNED THEM IN MONTHS. I never knew what it felt like to be unafraid in such a long time

Leo: *starts singing* for the first time in forever

Room starts changing

Hazel: Shut up Leo

Leo: I DONT HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU, NO ONE DOSE, NOT ANYMORE

Hazel: I've lost everything

* * *

**I'm Obsessed with frozen don't know why. Comet if you read the French part on the last question.**

**-Divergentdemigods**


	12. To The Demigods: Fav Disney movie

**To The demigods: Favorite Disney movie-Ellez41**

Coach Hedge: WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE DEMIGODS WHY CAN'T IT EVER BE ME

Annabeth: Frist of all you always answer with ''DIE'' and second of all you always show up randomly

Coach Hedge: I do not

Annabeth: YES YOU DO, YOU AND NICO AND THAILA AND CALYPSO ALWAYS RANDOMLY SHOW UP

Thalia/Coach/Nico/Calypso: It's not our fault everyone Loves us

Annabeth: Gahhh

Leo: hmmmmm, FROZEN

Frank: Ironic isn't it

Leo: we all know you love mulan

Frank: SO WHAT LEO, YOU HAVE PROBLEM *Where's Mulan T-shirt*

Leo: Nope

Percy: THE LITTLE MERMAID. SO WHEN I WAS SIX FOR HALLOWEEN I DRESSED UP AS ARIEL RIGHT MOM

Sally: . . . No Comment

Percy: I HAVE THE BIGGESST COLLECTION OF THE LITTLE MERMAID, I HAVE THE COSTUEMS AND EVERYTHING, OH AND FLOUNDER STUFFIES

Sally: No Comment

Percy: I EVEN GOT THE SEVEN TO MAKE A REMAKE OF IT, DID YOU LIKE IT MOM

Sally: it was umm nice

Annabeth: Really

Sally: NO IT WAS AWFUL, IM SORRY PERCY BUT YOU CANT ACT OR SING OR DANCE OR ANYTHING

Percy: You said I was good

Sally: You were six and dressed as a freaking mermaid, I wasn't even sure then

Percy:WHAT, so much betrayal, i cant even

Percy: Posassden can you believe Sassly wasn't even sure of me

Posassden: No comment

Percy: WAS ANYONE SURE WHEN I WAS SIX

Sally: No Percy, no one was sure, I just went with it

Percy: I CANT BELIVE THIS WHY

Sally: Before you met Grover, you only played with girls, you hated the Hulk and superman and you dressed up as Ariel every day.

Percy: Well I at least I knew Annabeth was always sure

Annabeth: Yeah, of course I was Percy *starts hands start sweating**eyes moving faster**Rubs noses* is it me or is it hot in here better be leaving, this is a family thing *Runs away*

Jason: soo pernico can still happen?

Everyone: . . . No Comment . . .

Jason: I'm saying that's a yes. *wear's pernico t-shirt* PERNICO FOR EVA *fly's around ship yelling*PERNICO FOR EVA, PERNICO FOR EVA, PERNICO FOR EVA,PERNICO FOR EVA,

* * *

**If you read the French and couldn't understand it I'm sorry, I suck at French it's my worst subject. Sass on Everyone**

**-Divergentdemigods**


	13. To All: Fav Frozen Song

**To everyone and anyone who wants to show up: What's your favorite Frozen song?-tswift1fan**

Leo: LET IT GOOOO, LET OT GOO I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE

Piper: That's because you made a stupid parody of it.

Leo: I have you know it was not stupid yet a brilliant idea

Piper: You latterly just changed anything that had to do with Ice and snow to something that had to do with Fire and Heat

Leo: and it got 100,928 views on Demitube

Piper: THAT'S CAUSE YOU RIGGED IT SO THAT ANYONE WHO GOES ON IT HAS TO WATCH YOUR DUMB VIDEO

Leo: and might I say it was a brilliant video

Jason: I really like that ice song in the begging

Frank: You've got to be kidding me; I could barely understand what they were saying

Jason: they were singing about ice and how to cut them, geez Frank

Frank: How do you even, Piper how

Piper: it's hard dating a retard

Percy: SO JASONS THE RETARD,Ive should've known talking to Annabeth about hiding being blonde and all the stupid pernico petitions you go around making people sign. Pernico must be the ship name for you and Annabeth

Thalia: It's funny how dumb he is, I don't like any frozen songs

Everyone: *Gasp*

Thalia: What

Zeus: THAT'S IT, I DON'T CARE IF YOU WON THAT SASS OFF YOU ARE WATCHING FROZEN UNTIL YOU LIKE IT

Thalia: But daaad, I have to go with the hunters this afternoon

Zeus: That's your fault for not liking it

Thalia: But daddy, please *pouts*

Zeus: NO

Thalia: Geez no need to be so rude

Hazel: *Sings to Nico* Do you want shadowtravel, or raise the dead. We used to be best buddies but now were not, I wish you could tell me why

Nico: go away Hazel

Hazel: okay bye

Leo: My turn, my turn *start singing* the sun glows bright on the mountain tonight not a footprint to be seen. A kingdom of isolation and it look like I'm the king,

Room starts changing

Piper: LEO STOP

Leo: *stoops singing* *whines* why

Piper: why is it anytime you sing the room starts changing?

Leo: I'm guessing it because when the Apollo cabin was giving me singing lessons they had this fruit on the table and they were all like ''don't eat it Leo'' so I ate it, and now anytime I sing the room changes

Piper: That is the dumbest thing you've ever done

Percy: so if you were to sing under Da Sea, would it change so we would be in Atlantes

Leo: Yeah I guess so

Percy: START SINGING

Everyone but Percy: NO

Percy: fine,you know when they were teaching me they give this mic thingy and anytime I sing into it my voice sound even better

Annabeth: how do you sound without it?

Percy: i don't know *sings without mic*

Leo: *Ears bleed*Oh MY GOD MY EARS THEY ARE LITERALLY BLEEDING

Frank: I'M GETTING OFF THIS SHIP. *runs off boat* FREE FRANKY *Turns into giant orca* *swims away from ship*

Piper: JASON CALL YOUR HORSE I'M NOT GONNA DIE ON THIS TRAIN WREAK

Jason: I'M CALLING IT, YOU KNOW WHAT LETS JUST FLY OFF *Grabs piper* *Fly's off of boat*I CAN STILL HEAR IT

Hazel: NICO GET YOUR LITTLE BUTT OUT OF THAT ROOM OUR ELSE WHERE GONNA DIE HERE

Nico: *holds stuff*Sto diventando outta here femmine *Shadow travels to China*

Hazel: ARION GET OVER HERE NOW

Arion; nahhh (translation: GODS THIS IS AWFUL LET GET OUT OF THIS HELL HOLE. F THE GUY WHOS SINGING)

Hazel: * jumps on Arion* *rides into the sunset*

Leo: WHERE IS BUFORD WHEN YOU NEED IT, BUFORD *jumps on Buford* *starts flying*

Annabeth: LEO DON'T LEAVE ME HERE

Leo: Sorry, only room for one and I'm going straight to Ogygia

Annabeth: WHY YOU LITLLE-

Percy: *Keeps singing*

Annabeth: what did I ever do to deserve this *cry's*

Percy: Did you like it

Annabeth: *sobs*

Percy: Okay? Where did everyone go?


	14. To Demigods: Fav Tv shows

**To The Seven: Favorite TV show –Ellez42**

Piper: ONCE UPON A TIME, Like I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO EXPLAIN HOW GOOD THAT IS

Annabeth: I like the discovery channel

Piper: Annie, Hun. I knew you were boring but not that boring

Annabeth: There's a lot of good educational show on it

Piper; Annabeth, Listen to the truth. You that's you, it's who you are and you need to live with it

Annabeth: I don't get where you people get your sass, its even sass it just plain mean

Piper: Someone can't handle it right now. *Puts on shades*Flips hair*

Thalia: WALKING DEAD

Rachel: I love the walking dead

Annabeth: YOU'RE NOT EVEN A DEMIGOD

Rachel: I'm an Oracle, I can answer whatever I want little miss boring

Annabeth: that's not even good

Rachel: I'm getting a vision, I see Annabeth walking away now because she can't handle the crowd right now. Oh and she GOT NO SASS

Leo: BURNNNNN

Annabeth; I can't even, begin to explain

Percy:*holds mic* are you ready guys

Frank: As ill every be

Percy: *sings into mic* my little pony, my little pony

Leo: I used to wonder what friend ship could be

Percy: my little pony

Frank: Until you all shared its magic with me

Percy: My little pony

Nico: Big adventure, Tons of fun

Jason: A beautiful heart, faithful and strong

Percy/Frank: Sharing kindness, it's an easy feat

Leo/Nico: And Magic makes it all complete

Jason: My Little Pony

Percy: Did you know you guys are all my best friends

Percy/Jason/Leo/Nico/ Frank: *Dances* *bows*

Hazel: That did not just happen; I did not just listen and watch this.

Annabeth: Join the club, Lévesque*sips latte* join the club

* * *

**So that is the real theme song of my litle pony,in case some of yall didnt know that,Sass on Everyone**

_**-DivergentDemigods**_


	15. To The Girls:Do You Ever Get Mad

**To The Girl: Do You Ever Get Mad AT Each Other–TheMortalsDontKnow**

Leo: There like best friends, always sharing secrets, talk, you know girl stuff

Piper: Yeah When THERE NOT STEALING MY FOOD OR HAIR PRODUCTS

Hazel: Not like you ever use them any ways, Mrs. Split ends and at least I'm not a lazy pig that I have to steal other people's food touch my books

Annabeth; Well at least I don't charmspeack or scare my boyfriend

Hazel/piper: *Gasp*

Piper: SHUT UP BOOKWORK, BY THE WAY TRIS DIES AND ROCK FACE, FRANKS BEEN HIDEINNG YOU'RE BANANAS UNDER HIS BED

Hazel: FRANK, HOW DARE YOU

Frank: Piper, you promised you wouldn't tell

Piper: I lied

Annabeth: Like you lied about your hair

Piper: *Gasp* Why YOU LITTLE BLODNIE BETCH

Hazel: Shut up beauty queen we all know that franks been doing your hair and that you can't even braid a Barbie doll

Jason: is, is this true piper. I'm your husband, I deserve the need to know this tuff

Piper: AT LEAST MY BOYFRIENDS SMART

Annabeth: MINE IS LIKE THE PINCE OF THE SEA

Piper: MINE IS THE PIRNCE OF THE FRIC FRAC FREAKING GODS, beat the witch girl

Hazel: IM THE FRICK FRACK PRINCESS OF THE UNDERWORLD BETCHES, I CONTROL WITCH DAMEND SOULs GO TO HELL, AND IM LOOKING AT TWO OF THEM

Nico: Actually that's me, hazel

Hazel: *ignores Nico* AND AT LEAST I HAVE USEFUL POWERS. I DON'T NEED MY BOYFRIEND TO SAVE MY 24/7

Annabeth/Piper: WHY YOU LITTLE-

Leo: I thought you guys were friends

Percy: Yeah what happened to all those sleep over parities, you guys do

Leo: when did you become enemies?

Annabeth: Who said we were enemies

Piper: Yeah, I could never hate them. What would I do if I didn't have Annabeth to talk about books and boys with Or Hazel to help me sword fight and do her hair

Annabeth: and who else would do my hair so perfectly, I mean look at it *shows beautiful hair* and hazel has the best stories from the forty's, and I could talk to her about architect all the time

Hazel; *tears up* And Piper is soo pretty like it's not even fair, she helped me so much with learning about this century and Annabeth is soo smart, I don't know what I do without her

Girls: * tears up*

Hazel: *cries of happiness* YOUR MY BESTFRIENDS

Annabeth/Piper: *cries as well* YOU MY BESTFRIENDS TOO

Jason: Da Fauq, just happened

Percy: I don't know man, I don't know *scratches head like a little confused rerated dumb monkey who can't climb*

**Sorry for the long wait, been so busy with school and what not,**

**Sass on every one (I've begging to realize I use that saying a lot, lol :)**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	16. To Demigods: who would you turn into oth

**To the seven: if you could be anyone who was NOT part of the seven who would you be and why-Ellez42**

Leo: STOP THE RULES WOMAN

Percy: Wait, so people outside the seven tells us who they would want to be if they were part of the seven?

Annabeth: The other way around retard

Frank: WE ALREADY DID THIS STUPID QUESTION, you know the one where everyone said everyone else but ME; LIKE I AM ANYTHING PEASENT YOU SHOULD WORSHIP AT HOW AMAZING I AM AT ANYTHING

Hazel: Frist of all, bad pun. Seconded of all Let it go let goo

Leo: Can't hold it back anymore

Room changes

Piper: SHUT UP LEO

Leo: fine

Thalia: Okay so, do we answer or do the Gods answer

Annabeth: Where did you get the Gods in that question?

Thalia: Well it did say anyone

Annabeth: DI IMORTALES

Nico; No, no Thalia's right. Wait could we answer with a dead soul

Thalia: Oh my gods.

Percy: THAT WOULD BE SO AWESOME

Children of the Big Three: *squeals in delight*

Annabeth: WHY ARE ALL THE CHILDEREN OF THE BIG THREE SO STUPID

Athena: HEY, at least you don't have to live all eternity with a God who makes stupid puns And Anther who thinks he's the gods of sass and anther one that's A MAN-WHORE

Zeus: Yeah, Hades you need to stop with all the children, I mean three in one century. *shakes head*

Hadesass: *wears crown of sass and cape that says 'make way for the king of sass* At least I didn't have 15 kids and annoying one popping from my head *puts on shades*

Posoi-pun: that was Hadesome *hits knee* *laughs at amazing pun*

Percy: Posei-pun, I worship you for your awesome puns

Annabeth/Athena: THEY WERE AWFUL

Nico: Farther, I am unworthy to be your son, your sass is to worthy to only have a sass prince for a son and not a sass king *bows down to farther*

Athena: Frist of all that was weak sass

Annabeth: Second, if you were the sass god then your son would be a sass king not a sass prince. BTW YOU'RE NOT THE SASS GOD

Thalia/Jason: HAVE MORE LOST LONG SIBLINGS

Annabeth/Athena: YES

* * *

**My stupid internet hasn't been working lately.**

**Sass on everyone.**

**~DivergentDemigods**


	17. To The Seven:Date A Stayer anyone?

**To The Seven: If you were to date a Satyr who would it be?-Iforgotwhowrotethisohwell**

Leo: WAIT! Wouldn't that be bestiality?

Annabeth/Percy: I CALL GROVER

Percy: Grover's mine Annabeth

Annabeth: I've known him longer then you

Percy: We went to the same school together

Annabeth: what does that has to do with anything?

Percy: THAT HES MINE

Annabeth: YOU'RE A GUY

Percy: SO WE'LL BE A GAY SHIP

Annabeth: Perover?

Grover: I don't know weather I should be flattered or not

Annabeth/Percy: GROVER

Grover: yes

Annabeth/Percy: Chose now, who would you want to date.

Annabeth: Me or the retard

Percy: Why do always bring up that guy

Annabeth: No words to explain how I feel right now.

Grover: Um,I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND.

Juniper: You're on your own

Grover: I thought we were past that. I WAS JOKEING

Juniper: does it look like I'm joking now

Annabeth: *holds sharp knife in hands*

Percy:*holds riptide* were waiting

Grover: You know what. NO. YOU CANT HAVE ALL THIS *gestures to self-* YOU BETCHS FIND A NEW STAYER CAUSE THIS ONE IS ON THE TRAIN TO LOVERS VILE. *pretends to be a train* CHOO CHOO BETCHES, IM GETTING LAID

Annabeth: *holds sharp knife in hands*

Percy:*holds riptide* were STILL waiting

Grover: I umm *Jumps off ship*

Juniper: Wuss

Hazel: DON IS MINE, YOU PEOPLE GO FIND YOUR OWN

Don: So, if I say yes to this you'll give me the diamond

Hazel: Yes

Don: Hazel Is MINE, WERE PRACTICALLY MARRIED

Piper/Jason: Were married **(A/N I wrote this a long time ago)**

Coach Hedge: Okay, which one of you cupcakes is going to be with me

Frank: I umm, I HAVE DEMON POX SO YEAH, YOU HAVE TO DATE LEO

Coach Hedge: So I'm with the brunt cupcake

Leo: Well I'm getting married to calypso soon, so yeah no

Calypso: No you're not

Leo: Yes I am

Calypso: He's lying have proof

Leo: what proof

Calypso: *puts on voice recording of Leo*

Leo's Voice recording:

Geez, Glad I'm not married

Never doing that

EVER!

Leo: YOU RECORD OUR CONVERSATIONS

Calypso: like I said before. *talks extremely slow* I…Don't…Trust…You…

Coach Hedge: *puts arms around Leo*I guess it's you and me against the world.

Leo: I'll get you for this

Calypso: I think he asked you to marry him

Leo: What no

Thalia: No she's right, coach hedge Leo wants to marry you

Coach Hedge: is that so

Leo: NO, REYNA HELP ME

Reyna: OMG OTP, OTP YOU GUYS NEED TO GET MARRIED LIKE RIGHTNOW

Thaila/Calypso: OMG YES COACH VALDEZ FOR THE WIN

Leo: NO

Thaila/Calypso/ Reyna: YES *Makes wedding preparations*

Leo: HAZEL STOP THEM

Hazel: COACH IF YOU MARRY LEO I'LL PAY YOU

Coach Hedge: how much, I can't just marry I stick you know

Leo: SOMEONE STOP THIS MADNESS, IM SORRY FOR FLIRTING STOP…..HEY IM NOT A STICK

Hazel: SIX UNCRUSSED DIAMOND

Leo: F U ALL

Frank: I WANT TO BE THE RING BOY

Jason/Percy: ONLY IF WE CAN BE THE FLOWER GIRLS

Percy: Jason lets wear blue and Yellow it look FABULAOUS

Jason: YASSS!1!1!1!

Annabeth: This…This I can't

Annabeth: I'm leaving don't even invite me to this madness

Leo: DADDY HELP ME

Hepfestus: *Hands out Coach Leo T-shirts* YOU GET A COACH VALDEZ SHIRT AND YOU GET A COACH VALDEZ SHIRT YOU ALL GET A COACH VALDEZ SHIRT

Leo: DAD STHAP YOU'RE NOT OPRAH

Hepfestus: Hi 'STHAP YOUR NOT OPRAH,' I'm Dad

Leo: I HATE EVERYONE, YOU ALL GO AND DIE OR SOMETHING

Nico: Same, THAT'S HOW I FEEL ALL THE TIME

Thaila: STHAP MESSING UP OUR OTP NICA, GO BACK TO YOUR JUDGEMENTAL DAD

Nico:

Nico:

Nico: At least my dad didn't turn me into a f*cking tree

Thaila:

Thaila:

Thaila: Betch you didn't-

Hasassdes: YASS MY SON IS THE SASS KING ONCE AGING

Hasassdes: SON YOU ARE NO LONGER A SASS PRINCE BUT A SASS KING HERE'S YOUR SASS ROBE AND CROWN *Gives Crown and Robe*

Nisassco: YASS, BOW DOWN TO ME PEASANTS I OWN ALL OF YOUR IDIOT MINDS *Sits in throne*

Annabeth: *Walks back in* Di immortals why did I come back

Percy: *Wearing Blue and Yellow tux* Lets go we're going to miss the wedding

Annabeth: Sometimes I think we're all sane then this happens randomly and I question our society

Athena: #TRUTH#Annabethisdeep

Annabeth: That was not deep mother

Athena:#Annabethsmad

Annabeth: I'm not mad; I'm just stating my opinions

Athena: #Annabethlooksangery

Annabeth: Goodbye mother

Leo: GET THIS HIDEOUS DRESS OFF ME

Drew/Aphrodite: NO WE WORKED TO HARD ON THAT YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED IN THAT OR ELSE

Leo: I CHOSE OR ELSE

Drew: Okay, cabin 10 get your knives out were finally going to use blood as make up

Lacy: YAY, I've been waiting to do that since the titans

Mitchell: Lacy, can I do yours

Leo: YOU USE BLOOD AS YOUR MAKE UP, PIPER

Piper: WE WILL USE THE BLOOD OF OUR ENEMIES AS OUR FASHION STATEMENT, EVERYONE WILL SEE WHAT REALLY ALL ABOUT MAWHAAAA

Leo: NOT BLOOD MAKE UP

Drew: READY, ATTACK

Cabin 10: *Attacks Leo*

Leo: GET AWAY FROM ME ,YOU'RE CRAZY PEOPLE*runs in dress*

Leo: GAHH THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE TO RUN IN, IT'S TOO TIGHT

Thaila/ Reyna/Hazel/Calypso: STAHP DON'T HURT LEO

Leo: I knew you want me, don't worry there enough Sexy Leo time to go around

Thaila/ Reyna/Hazel/Calypso: WE WANT HIS BLOOD

Leo: WTF NO GET AWAY FROM ME

Athena: #Leo'sadeadman#Leo'sfunneralontuesday

Annabeth: Stop the hashtags mother

Athena: #Annabethsbeingbitchy again

Annabeth: Am not

Nico: Yes you are, now please leave your ugliness is disturbing*puts on shades*

Athena: Don't speak to my daughter like that

Hasassdes: Did that peasant just talk to us,

Nisassco: I think so Farther, it's sad that they don't know there place in this world

Hasassdes: True dat, true dat

Athena: News Flash you're not the god of sass

Hasassdes: Did you hear something

Nisassco: Maybe it was her Fly of a mother

Athena: HOW DARE YOU

Hasassdes: HOW DARE THIS PEASENT TALK TO US, SASS KING NICO CAN YOU BELIVE THIS

Nisassco: GODS FARHER U CANT EVEN HEAR OVER HER LOUD HAIR

Leo: Good one

Hasassdes: I'm so sorry, you look hideous, just like you're D- list daddy

Leo…

Nisassco: Farther, I don't think he heard us, there's all those screaming girl with knives behind him

Leo: What..*TURNS AROUND* *SEES GIRLS WITH KNIVES* NOW YOU TELL ME

Annabeth: I'm going to sleep, when I wake up everyone is gone

Annabeth: EVERYONE

Athena: #Annabethsgrouchy

Annabeth: especially you mother.

Nico/Hades: BURNNNNN

Posi-Pun/Perpuncy: don't you meant DEATHHH

Everyone:

The gods:

Life:

Mortals:

Coach Hedge: See yeah, it was nice almost getting married

Nico/Hades: Same time tomorrow

Athena/Annabeth: yeah bye

Thaila: Lets meet tomorrow to discuss about coach Valdez

Reyna/Hazel/Calypso: Yeah, bye

Leo: Thanks guys bye

Cabin 10: Kk luv yeah all

Perpuncy: Sea yeah later

Posi-Pun: *Falls off ship laughing*

* * *

**IM THE WORST PERSON EVER**

**LIKE SERIOUSLY I BARELY UPDATE ANYMORE I UNDERSTAND IF ALL YOU HATE ME NOW, I DON'T EVEN HAVE A REAL REASON OTHER THEN IM A LAZY ASS WITH A NETFLIX ACCOUNT, IM SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME.**

**ANYWAYS, I wrote this a long time ago that's why piper and Jason are still married and Annabeth's not heart broken. I don't even know why I didn't post this, there is nothing wrong with it oh well.**

**Hey, did any of you hear what about the Justin and Orleans's fight?**

**I Joined gishwish if any of you care… probably not**

**I have a poll up, so go look at that please and vote and Stuff**

**Useless stuff….**

**Oh, I just notice a lot of people are doing ask the seven stuff on here.**

**Yeah I'm done**

_**Sass on everyone**_

_**~DivergentDemigods**_


	18. To Annabeth:Dumbest person on Argo ll

**To Annabeth: Dumbest person on Argo ll –Iheartpercyjackson101**

Annabeth: This is a hard question, like really hard *look at all the dumb people on Argo ll*

Annabeth: Okay, so let start with Leo. He thinks that if he coughs hard enough he'll breathe fire

Leo: It Will Work; you just have to believe

Annabeth: Then he keeps flirting with Thalia even though she can't date

Leo: Can't or Won't *Winks at Thalia*

Annabeth: And he can't add

Leo: Sure I can. Me + Thalia = True love

Thalia: No it doesn't

Leo: you know you want it *wiggles eyebrows*

Thalia: ARTEMIS, COME AND HELP ME

Artemis: I'm really busy with, uhh goddess stuff. So unless it's something important don't call

Thalia: You are literally just taking selfies and posting it on Demigram

Artemis: So What DO YOU HAVE PROBLEM WITH IT

Thalia: *Mutters under breath* self centered bitch

Artemis: * Creepily Turns head * what was that

Thalia: Nothing, My Lady

Annabeth: Now Jason

Annabeth: He sometimes thinks he's the last air bender and dress up as Aang

Jason: *dress as Aang* MoMo where are you

Frank: For the last time I don't want to be MoMo

Jason: But we need to save the Nations from *turns head*squints eyes*talks deep* Leo

Frank: Fine *turns into MoMo*

Jason: Yip Yip

Annabeth: You see, gosh and he ships unrealistic things it's just so stupid

Jason: PERNICO, WILL SURVIVE

Nico: time for a betch to go to hell.

Nico:*holds baseball bat*hit Jason repeatedly* takes out shot gun*shoots Jason five times*put in bag*throws into ocean*

Nico: now that's done *reads city of bones*

Annabeth: That leaves us with the biggest retard born: Percy

Percy: WHERE IS HE ANNABETH, I MUST SLAY THE RETARD

Annabeth; It's so hard, and he's always talking about The Little Mermaid or Pizza

Percy: *dressed as Princess Ariel and eating pizza* under da sea, darling its better, down where it's wetter under da sea

Annabeth: Did I mention he can't write, like I can't even understand it

Percy: I Csn witre anaebtnh, I witre rwel guud, I witre better tehn u,see how guud I yam ananebtnh. I yam smarter tehn Leo and Jsaon

Annabeth; I can't even…

Annabeth; So there all equally stupid

Percy: vut I yam smarter tehn that reartd right anaebthn

Annabeth; I take it back, Percy is the dumbest


	19. To The Ships: Babby Names

**To The Ships: What ya baby's name-Lemonade Lunatic**

Annabeth: What kind of question is that? IT DOESN'T MAKES SENSE LEMONADE.

Percy: Geez Annabeth, it mean what would we name our children.

Annabeth:

Athena:

Pinecone face: . . . HEY, JACKSON

Everyone on the planet:

Percy: What?

Annabeth: You just said something smart.

Athena: It's a miracle

Percy: Should I be insulted by that?

Athena: Miracles over. See yeah later βλάκα *poofs into thin air*

Piper: Hmm, you know I never really thought about it

Jason; well if I had to come up with something I say Mal-

Piper: We would name our son Xander and are daughter Kathrine because it's Greek

Jason: But Xander isn't gree-

Piper: And our son will look like me but have Jason's personality and our daughter will look like Jason but have my personality

Jason: So our daughter will be a bossy betch

Piper: Excuse me

Jason: You heard me

Piper: We must leave for a moment.

In a different room

*bunch of yelling*screaming* slamming* *more yelling*death threats*

Leo: Looks like pipers winning

Frank: I have faith in Jason

Jason: *comes out with black eye* our children names will be Xander and Kathreine beacuse there Greek.

Jason: Are you happy now

Piper: Yes

Hazel: I'm only thirteen; I don't have any good names. What about you frank

Hade/Pluto:

Argo ll:

Bother Mother Fu****ing camps:

Death breath: . . . Not funny

Hazel: What

Frank: you weren't scary or being bossy. You were NICE

Hazel: Do you think I'm scary, do you all think I'm scary

Frank: Well yeah

Hazel: I can't believe it, I'm a MONSTER, I'm just like all those thing those kids said about me in school*runs into room crying*

Leo: way to go man, you just made her cry

Frank: I'll go comfort her

Leo: *put up hand to Franks face* NO*grins* I'll do it

Leo: *goes into Hazel's room* *puts arms around hazel*listens to problems* Yes, yes go on. I'm right here for you forever

Calypso: LEO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING

Leo: How do you manage to come during the worst times?

Calypso: it's because I don't trust you during those times.

Leo: why don't you trust me?

Calypso: *points at Leo's arm around hazel* THAT'S WHY

Leo: WELL MAYBE IF YOU TRUST ME MORE I WOULDN'T BE DOING THINGS LIKE THIS

Calypso: SO YOU'RE BLAMING ME FOR THIS MESS, LEO YOU NEED TO STOP LIEING TO YOURSELF

Leo: Are you calling me a Liar

Calypso: I AINT CALL YOU A TRUTHER

Leo: Excuse us; we need to talk more privately

Calypso/Leo: *goes into Leo's room*hears yelling*screaming*slamming*

Jason: I say calypso is going to win

Percy: My bets on Leo

**(A/N: IT'S ABOUT TO GET PG UP IN HERE)**

Jason/Percy:*puts head to Leo's door*hears moaning*more moaning*calypso calling Leo's name*some more PG things*

Calypso: Gods Leo, keep going *moans* more

Leo: like I'm ever going to stop.

Jason: I think I'm going to throw up

Percy: *Vomits everywhere* Annnnaaaabbbeettthhh *vomits more* *accidentally falls off ship throwing up in the water*

Jason: *hears more* GODS, I can still hear it. NICO, THROW ME INTO THE UNDERWORLD

Nico: No, it's fun to watch you suffer *slowly eats banana while watching Jason listen to Calypso and Leo's Fric Frac*

Jason: *stabs self with butter knife until he dies*

* * *

**I Would have added more to the PG thing but i couldn't stop myself from laughing to type it all for the long wait to respond to your question Lemonade Lunatic.**

**Sass on everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	20. To Nico: Do you think your better

**To Nico: Do you ever think your better then percy-Justpercyjacksonthings**

Percy: me and nice are buddys,he would never think that

Nico: Yes, a lot actually

Percy: Not to be rude but no one is better than me

Nico: Really

Percy: well yeah , I held the sky,

Nico: I CAN SUMMON THE DEAD

Percy: I DEFEATED KRONOS

Nico: I LEARNED THAT GAIA WAS THE BIG BAD BETCH BEFORE ANYONE ELSE

Percy: I LED CAMP HALF-BLOOD THROUGH THE BATTLE OF MANHATTEN

Nico: I CAN LEAD OTHER HALD-BLOODS THROUGH THE UNDERWORLD TO TARTUROUS

Percy: I KILLED PLOYPHEMUS

Nico: I BROUGHT BACK MY HALF SISTER FROM THE DEAD

Percy: I LOST MY MEMORY AND STILL REMEMBERED ANNABETH

Nico: I FOUND THE ROMAN CAMP FRIST

Percy: I BEACME PARETOR

Nico: I BECAME AN HONERY ROMAN SENETOR

Percy: I umm GOT THE ACHILLES HEEL

Nico: that you lost from going into the roman camp

Nico: BTW I LERANED ABOUT THE ACHILLES CURSE

Percy: ummm

Nico: I SURVIVEDIN A JAR WITH ONLY POMERGRANTE SEEDS

Percy:. .. IM THINKING

Nico: I SURVIVED TARTUROUS BY MYSELF

Percy: STOP,IM STILL THINKING

Nico: I AM THE GOSHT KING

Percy: I HATE THIS GAME *runs into room crying*

Annabeth: Great,you got him crying. You know last time he cried, HE FLOOED THE SHIP!

Nico: fine I'll go say sorry

Nico: *walks to Percy's room * *knocks on door* * hears heavy breathing on neck* *Turns head* *sees Jason*

Nico: what the hell man

Jason:*films* I'm getting a Pernico scene for my movie

Nico: Excuse me

Jason: and I'm going to show everyone so that they all can watch with me

Nico: . . .

Jason: PERNICO FOREVA

Nico: Time to kill a betch *takes out frying pan from back pocket*

Jason; how do you put a frying pan in your pocket

Nico: *hits Jason with frying pan*

Percy: what going on *sees Jason with pernico t-shirt* ANNABETHS MINE *gets frying pan from under the pillow*

Jason: you sleep with a frying pan

Nico/Percy: *hits Jason with a frying pan*puts Jason in a trash bag* throws into the closet*

Leo: someone should let piper know that Jason's in the closet again


	21. To All: Challenge

**To The Seven and the Gods: you have to swear on the river Styx that you'll have to do this-umm**

Athena/Annabeth: THAT'S NOT A QEUSTION

Athena: I refuse to answer or do anything without knowing the consequence

Poseidon/Percy: . . .

Annabeth: she means; she won't do anything unless she know what it is

Poseidon/Percy: OH

Zeus: Don't be so uptight

Hades: never thought you'd be the one to say that

Zeus: after reading TFIOS, i've decided not to be so uptight anymore

Hades: okay

Hermes: so does everyone agree

Everyone: yeah

_**Ummm: I dare you all to eat Leos cooking for a month!**_

Zeus: Holy crap, I didn't know it was going to be that

Piper: DO YOU WANT US TO DIE

Leo: *puts on chef's hat* yes, today is my day to show everyone how good I am

Calypso: I told you to quit your dream

Leo: and I didn't listen, so what

Zeus: So were all going to stop eating for a month

Hepfestus: yep

Two weeks later at around 7

Percy: Gods, I'm going to die

Annabeth: I'm almost desperate enough to eat it, Aren't you piper

Piper: Uhh yeah. GODS IM STRAVEING

Jason: Yeah, I NEED TO EAT SOMETHING *runs off*

Piper: You know Jason's been acting wired, I'm going to go see if I can help him *runs off*

Hazel: those betchs are hideing something

The Seven and The Gods outside Jason's room

Piper: Gods, Jason this is so good

Jason: I know piper I know

Zeus: I'm going to barf

Poseidon: *throws up* Amphritteeeeeeeeee *falls into ocean**throws up in water*

Piper: MORE

Jason: Shh, there going to hear us

Athena: a little too late for that

Piper: I don't care, Jason I just want more

Aphrodite: **Angels sing Aphrodite theme song**

Athena: Why did we give her that?

Apollo: I don't know

Aphrodite: what are we doing

Percy: Listening to Piper and Jason Fric Frac

Aphrodite: There not Fric Frac, I would know if they were

Athena: THEN WHAT ARE THEY DOING

Ares: *kicks down doors*

Jason: *cooking something on a stove*

Piper: *eating something Jason made* It's not what it looks like *food falling out of her mouth*

Jason: *drops everything* SHE MADE ME DO IT, SHE CHARMED SPEAKED ME, SHE SAID IF I DIDN'T DO IT THEN SHE WAS GOING TO FILE A DIVORSE. HER NOT ME*POINTS FINGERS AT PIPER* HER

Piper: Thanks Jason FOR TELLING EVERYONE

Jason: I HAD TO

Piper: NO YOU DIDN'T, YOU COULD HAVE SAID IT WAS LEO WHO MADE IT

Leo: you know I'm right here. Right?

Jason: DON'T YOU BLAME HIM FOR YOUR MESS

Piper: SO IT'S MY FAULT THAT THIS HAPPENED

Everyone: *slowly backs out of room* *Door shuts behind them*

Apollo: Shit, were stuck

Jason: WELL YES ''Jason can you make me dinner, Jason can you make me a Latte'' ITS ALWAYS JASON AND WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENDS ITS ALWAYS MY FAULT

Piper: WELL IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT, INSTEAD OF LIEING YOU TELL THE TRUTH

Jason: THAT'S SOMETHING YOU CANT DO

Piper; *gasp* HOW DARE YOU

Jason: WHY DON'T YOU GO STEAL A CAR OR SOMETHING

Piper: WHY DON'T YOU GO EAT A STAPLER OR GET HIT BY A BRICK AGAIN

Jason: DON'T BRING THEM INTO THIS MESS

Piper: I KNEW IT YOU LOVE THAT STAPLER MORE THEN ME, RIGHT EVERYONE

Everyone: umm yeah

Jason: WELL ISNT SHE BOSSY SOMETIMES

Everyone: yeah

Aphrodite: Mabye you should see a couples therapists

Piper: WERE PERFECTLY FINE, WERE HAPPLIY MARRIED

Jason: *mutters* wouldn't say happily

Piper: EXCUSE ME

Jason: nothing

**Hahaha, I love fights, Anyways some guest was all like ''why do you have an obsession on making Percy so stupid'' to answer that, it's because I want it to be funny. It has to have some series joke, kind of like how an How I Met your Mother they never say what barney dose, yet he seems to do it all the time(until he got drunk tells everyone).so I did something like that, but with Percy being stupid, and Leo singing/cooking, Hazels banana issue and so on. And if this response sounded mean. Sorry**

**Sass on Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	22. To Percy: Poem

**To Percy: Make a Poem for Annabeth-Loveisinthyair**

Leo: This ought to be good

Percy: Umm okay. 1 universe,

12 Gods, 9 planets,

7 seas, 7 continents, 809 islands,

204 countries.

And I had the luck of finding you

Annabeth: Aww, that was so sweet and smart.

Percy: Thank you, you're welcome

Annabeth: But there are 8 planets

Leo: way to put the mood down

Annabeth: Sorry, but there is only 8 planets

Leo: since when

Annabeth: since 2006

Leo: so they added a another planet in 2006 to make 9 planets

Annabeth: There are 8 planets you uncultured swine.

Leo: so what your saying is there is 8 planets

Annabeth: YES

Percy: Stupid Pluto. Messing up my poem

Leo: Yeah. VIVA LA PLUTO F**K YOU

Hazel: *tears up* I'm pretty sure that was the best sentence I've heard all weak. *makes sign* *holds up sign* *yells at Pluto* VIVA LA PLUTO F**K YOU

Pluto: What did I ever do to you?

Hazel: Frist off, YOU GAVE ME STUPIED CURSED ROCK POWERS WHILE NICO GOT AWESOME RASING THE DEAD POWERS

Pluto: I wanted to try something new with you

Hazel: Next, You Stop Getting Me My BANANAS

Pluto: I'm trying to help you; you have a problem you know

Hazel: I DO NOT.

Nico: Farther I love the powers you have given me. And I'm perfectly fine with you cutting off my Happy Meal addiction

Pluto: *ignores Nico*

Nico: *gives farther happy meal* Do you like it; I paid for it this time instead of stealing it

Pluto: *takes happy meal**throws in garbage* I hate happy meals * buys bananas* *gives to hazel*

Hazel: I still don't love you. VIVA LA PLUTO F**K YOU

Pluto: I'll give you anything my dear child

Nico: *wears baseball cap* I always wanted to learn how to play baseball

Pluto: NOT YOU, Hazel

Hazel: I want a phone, flat screen, unlimited bananas, better powers, a dog, a pool, speakers, TFIOS movie tickets, Persephone to praise me, Octavian die, a machine gun-

Frank: why do you want a machine gun?

Hazel: because I want one, Oh and a Tardis

Pluto: *gives hazel everything*

Nico: you know farther, I would love you more if we played mythomagic together

Pluto: NO ONE CARES NICO

Hazel: I don't see that betch praising me

Persephone: What have I ever done to you?

Hazel: don't you remember the flower incident

Persephone: Oh yeah now I remember, I'm still not parsing

Pluto: JUST DO IT

Persephone: Fine *bow at hazels feet* Oh hazel, your greatness cannot be explained into words. You are even better than that betch Hera and me. You are better than the Gods and should be held up at the highest for your greatness

Hazel: I DONT SEE OCTIVAN DYING

Octavian: is no one concerned that I'm about to die

Reyna: We all want you dead, we want to stab you with a knife a thousand times and watch you have a slow and painful death until your pathetic body goes to hell and you burn for the rest of your life. And in your afterlife we hope someone tortures you until you go and jump off a cliff and die. Then go back to hell. *puts on sunglasses*

Frank: You know that wasn't sass

Octavian: thank you

Frank: it was the truth

Octavian: . . .

* * *

**Viva La Pluto F**k you. I just love that. Don't you**

**Sass on everyone**

**-Divergent demigods**


	23. To Anyone: Brason

**To Anyone: Who ships Brason-Metheperson7**

Annabeth: What kind of name is that?

Percy: I'm pretty sure it's a ship name Annabeth

Annabeth: it's not even funny anymore

Percy: how is Brason Funny?

Annabeth: *hits head on table*

Percy: you okay. Do you need a therapist or something?

Annabeth:*continues to hit head*

Percy: LEO

Annabeth: I'm hitting myself, and you call Leo to help me. DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE

Leo: I can be a good doctor

Annabeth: really

Leo: *puts head down* no *walks away sobbing* WHY CANT MY DREAMS COME TRUE

Calypso: That cause you suck at everything

Leo: Your are such a nice girlfriend you know

Calypso: What you want me to lie to you

Leo: that would be nice

Calypso: Okay, Leo you are an amazing Cook. . . and if I was dying because of what you cooked. I would want you to be my doctor . . . so i may die in your arms

Leo: That hurts even more then you telling me the truth

Calypso: I know, that's what I was trying to do

Piper: At least he doesn't love cooking more then you

Jason: The Stapler and Brick were nothing to me, they were a phase

Piper: SO YOU ADMIT IT

Jason: Admit what, I admit nothing

Piper: I can't believe you, YOU WONT EVEN ADMIT IT

Jason: ADMIT WHAT PIPER, I DON'T LOVE THEM MORE THEN YOU

Piper: THEN WERE HAVE YOU BEEN GOING AT NIGHT, I KNOW IT'S WITH THE BRICK JASON

Jason: You being paranoid

Piper: HOW DARE YOU GRACE

Jason: you do know you're a grace to

Piper: MABY I DON'T WANT TO BE ONE ANYMORE

Jason: YEAH, JUST RUN AWAY FROM YOUR PROBLEMS LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO

Piper: I DO NOT RUNAWAY

Jason: You're right you don't, YOU GO STEAL CARS FOR A ATTENION,

Piper: WHAT DOSE THAT MEANS

Jason: THAT YOU'RE AN ATTENION WHORE

Piper: *gasp* AT LEAST I DON'T GET KNOCKED OUT EVERYTIME THERES A FIGHT

Jason: HEY, AT LEAST I DIDN'T SEND MY BEST FRIEND TO AN ISLAND WITH AN ANGERY GODDESS

Piper: I SAVED HIS LIFE, SOMETHING YOU CAN'T DO

Jason: I CAN PEOPLELIVES

Piper: when you're not unconscious

Leo: Are you guys okay; you fight a lot now a day

Jason/Piper: WERE PERFECTLY FINE, NOW GO BROTHER SOMEONE ELSE

Leo: Geez, Glad I'm not married

Leo: Never doing that

Leo: EVER!

Calypso: . . .

Leo: Calypso, you know I didn't mean-

Calypso: *walks away from Leo*

Percy: You guys screwed up big time. This is why I love Annabeth. She never gets mad or calls me names or threatens me.

Annabeth: *holds knife behind back* yeah, never

* * *

**Sorry I took so long to respond to this. I'll try to respond to them faster now.**

**Sass on everyone**

**-Divergent demigods.**


	24. To Annabeth: Best Movie

**To Annabeth: Best movie ever-Crazydaisy-in-tha-house**

Annabeth: I sear the names get stupider each time

Piper: I bet it's going to be really boring

Rachel: yeah, like one of those Disney nature movies

Annabeth: YOUR NOT A DEMIGOD, WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE

Rachel: cause I can

Annabeth: and I find those movies very inspiring

Rachel: Sorry, what were you saying I fell a asleep listening

Annabeth: do you really hate me or this just some stupid act to impress Percy

Rachel: I REALLY hate you, and I would never date that retard. How do you even manage?

Annabeth: * sobs* It's just so hard

Percy: I'm getting really tired with this retard person, WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE HIM SO MUCH THATS ALL ANYONE EVER TALKS ABOUT, EVERYTIME I WALK IN THE ROOM EVERYBODY STOPS AND THERE STARIN AT ME

Leo: I GOT PASSION IN MY PANTS AND I AINT AFRIAD TO SHOW IT, SHOW IT

Frank: *Deep voice* IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT

Jason: WIGGLE WIGGLE WIGGLE YEAH

Percy: WIGGLE WIGGLE WIGGLE YEAH

Frank: IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT

Frank/Jason/Percy/Leo: *Takes off shirt*wiggles*

Leo: *deep sexy voice* Ah... Girls look at that body*wiggles*

Jason: *deep sexy voice*Ah... Girls look at that body*wiggles*

Percy: *deep sexy voice* Ah... girl look at that body*wiggles*

Frank: I WORK OUT*wiggles*

Frank/Jason/Percy/Leo: IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT

Calypso: well Percy surly is

Leo: STOP HITTING ON MY FRIENDS IM YOUR BOYFRIEND

Calypso: *Sips coffee* No

* * *

**Hopefully this makes up for me takeing so long to uploand and responed**

**Sass on Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	25. To The Seven: ELMINATION

**To The Seven: If you could eliminate one person from the seven who would it be AND WHY- Ellz42**

Leo: RULES AGAIN, That's it I'm changing your name to Rule girl **(A/N I'm assuming you're a girl sorry if you're not)**

Percy: I have a Blond superman in mind

Jason: And I have a Retarded mermaid I wouldn't mind dying

Leo: There's a special Ox I wouldn't mind pushing of the ship

Frank: And a Flaming Elf that needs to engstiush

Percy/Jason: * Glares at each other holding swords*

Leo: *Holds flame*

Frank; *Turns into eagle repeatedly*

Annabeth: you still haven't said why

Leo; *mutters* dumbass rules

Percy: I WOULD ELIMANATE JASON BEACUSE HES TRYING TO STEAL MY LIFE

Annabeth: How?

Percy: look at him, poisoning my food

Jason: *Creates Latte for piper*

Annabeth: I think that's for piper

Jason: *sits in chair* *reads TFIOS*

Percy: Look at himreading about himself. What a self centered jerk

Annabeth: he's reading a book about cancer kids falling in love

Jason: Have you guys seen Piper and Leo, we were going on a small quest for Hermes

Percy: HES EVEN CREATING HIS OWN GLODN TRIO.

Piper as You

Leo as Grover

And JASON AS ME

Annabeth: calm down

Percy: Don't you see Annabeth it doesn't even stop there

Reyna as Rachel

Octavian as Luke

HE EVEN STOLE THAILA

Annabeth: you're being paraanoid

Percy: HE EVEN HAS HIS OWN SET OF GODS

Annabeth: Calm Down

Percy: ANNABETH HE'S STEALING MY LIFE THE SON OF JUPIETER STEALING THE LIFE OF THE SON OF POSIEDEN

Annabeth; CLAM DOWN

Percy: *hyperventilates* I CANT CALM DOWN *grabs Annabeth shoulders* *shakes Annabeth* IM GOING TO DIE BEACUSE HE POISEND ME

Annabeth: PERCY CALM DOWN

Percy: IM DYING ANNABETH, DYING

Annabeth: Get a hold of yourself

Percy: *drops to knees* Annabeth *coughs* I have to say something before I pass

Annabeth: And what that might be

Percy: I was going to ask you when we were older, but considering I'm about to die.

Percy:Annabeth Minerva Chase

Annabeth: . . . *stares at Percy in disgust*

Percy: What

Annabeth: That's not my middle name

Percy:Wha-

Annabeth: we've known each other for six years Percy SIX AND YOU DONT KNOW MY NAME, WERE DATEING TOO

Percy:I AM DYING AND YOU WANT TO FIGHT ABOUT YOUR MIDDLE NAME

Annabeth: *slaps Percy* LEARN MY NAME

Percy: FINE LET ME DIE ALONE

Annabeth: *walks away*

Percy: LEAVE THEN *lies on ground**closes eyes*puts hands on chest* I am ready, Thanatos take me away

Jason: So you haven't seen them

Percy: . . .

Jason: No, okay by then.


	26. Stuff happens

**To The Guys: What do you really ****LOVE ****about yourgirlfirends/wife- ****missawesome-demigodish**

Leo: At least it's not rule girl

Percy: Hmmm, What do I love about my girlfriend WHO LEFT ME TO DIE ALONE, NOW I'M A LONELY GHOST

Annabeth: You're not a ghost Percy

Percy: *moves around room all ghost like* YEAH I AM, THANTOES TOOK ME AWAY

Annabeth: no he didn't

Percy: Yes he did, he said he was going to take me elesiyum

Nico: No, he said he was going to take you to hell for giving him a fake pretence, then gave you ghost powers to look like an idoit

Percy: *ignores Nico* I'm going to scare Leo

Annabeth: but he's in the toilet Wazing

Percy: I know

Minutes later *Screaming* yelling*

Leo: LEAVE ME ALONE,

Percy: NOOOOOO, BOOO

Leo: AT LEAST LET ME PUT ON MY PANTS ON THIS IS EMBRASSING

Percy: BOOOO

Leo: *cries* IM NAKED IN FRONT OF A GHOST , CALYPSO IM SORRY FOR HITTING ON HAZEL,GET IT AWAY FROM ME PLEASE

Percy: Okay bye

Leo: really

Percy: Nah just messin with you. BOOO

Leo: *Runs out of bathroom naked* SOMEONE HELP ME

Percy: *Chases Leo* BOOOOO

Calypso: *films* this is what you get for being a terrible boyfriend

Leo: MOMMY *Passes Jason and piper*

Piper: So what's the thing you really love about me?

Jason: When you're not looking through my stuff

Piper: I do not

Jason: Yes you do

Piper: Well Mabye if you were actually committed to me

Jason: I AM COMMITTED TO YOU, BUT NOO YOU HAVE THINK I HAVE AN AFFAIR WITH BRICK

Piper: YOU JUST SAID IT LIKE IT WAS PERSON

Jason; DID NOT

Piper: DID TO

Jason: DID NOT

Piper: DID TO

Leo: *runs around naked screaming * HELP ME SOMEONE PLEASE, IT WANTS TO EAT ME

Percy: I WILL EAT YOUUUUUUUUU

Leo: HELP

Jason: *gets text**read text*laughs out loud*

Piper: WHO WAS THAT

Jason: No one

Piper: *grabs phone**read messages* ITS FROM THE BRICK, I KNEW IT

Jason: NO IT ISNT

Piper: ARE YOU STUPIED LOOK *shoves phone in jasons face*, I KNEW IT YOU LOVE IT MORE THEN ME

Jason: NO I DON'T

Piper: PROVE IT

Jason: FINE, *turns to face brick* I…Don't… Like..You

Brick: Excuse me

Leo; IT LICKED ME THE GOSHT LICKED ME AND IM NAKED

Percy: YOU'RE A DEAD MAN VALDEZZZZZZ BOOOOO

Leo: SOMEONE HELP ME

Piper: It can talk

Jason: well duh, how else am I supposed to speak with it?

Brick: HER

Jason: Speak with HER

Brick: I thought what we had was something special

Jason: That was in the past,im married now. It's time for you to move on

Brick: *Cry's*BUT IM WITH CHILD

Everyone on Argo ll: SAY WHAAAT

Brick: IT'S TRUE, THAT WHAT I CAME HERE FOR. JASON YOU'RE THE FARTHER

Annabeth: CAN BRICKS EVEN HAVE CHILDREN

Leo: IT TOUCHED ME, IT TOUCHED ME SOMEONE HELPS ME

Calypso: *films scene*put this on demi tube

Percy: I WILL COOK YOUUU AND FEED YOU TO MY PIG NAMED GOAT

Leo: IT'S GOING TO FEED ME TO A PIG HELP IM STILL NAKED

Brick: Well duh annabell, how else was I created?

Annabeth: THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE, THIS ISNT NATURE ITS AN EXPERIMENT THE DEVIL MADE

Nico: DONT BRING DADDY INTO THIS

Jason: IM GOING TO BE A FARTHER TO A BRICK, A BRICK DO YOU KNOW WHO WIRED THAT IS

Piper; THAT'S IT YOUR GOING DOWN BRICK *takles brick*

Brick: *fights piper*

Annabeth: THIS ISNT POSSIBAL, it's A DREAM A TERRIBAL DREAM

Jason: IM A FARTHER TO A BRICK, I SHOULDVE USED PROTECTION

Annabeth: DO BRICKS EVEN HAVE PARTS

LEO: HELP ME, ITS TEACHING ME STUFF AND IM STILL NAKED

Percy: WHAT 2+2

Leo: I DON'T KNOW

Annabeth: Since this is a dream, im going to get drunk and marry the first person I see

LEO: IM NAKED HELP ME

Annabeth: *drunk**sees pole* hey pole wanna get married

Pole: No

Annabeth: I DO

Annabeth: I may now kiss the pole *kisses pole*

Piper: *stabs brick with knife* DIE DIE

Brick: *Hits piper* I'm not dying that easy

Annabeth: da nan an na da nan na na

Hazel/Frank: *watches chaos*

Hazel: Do you know what this means

Frank: * penguin from batman* IM A PENGIUN AND I JUST CANT A ENOUGH, IM A PENGIUN AND I JUST CANT GET ENOUGH *Twerks* IM A PENGIUN AND I JUST CANT GET ENOUGH *Terwks like nicki manj*

Piper: *throws brick*

Hazel: *gets hit in the head by a brick*

In a different room

Hazel:*WAKES UP**sees everyone normal*

Frank: she's a awake

Hazel: Da Fauq happened

Piper: You passed out because someone gave you BEANS

Leo: SHE WANTED THEM

Percy: Annnaaabeeetthhh, What are beans

Annabeth: *hits head on wall* Go eat some Percy,then you'll know

Hazel: My dream was a lot funnier then this shit

* * *

**I don't know what happened, I started with a fight and I got that so yeah.** **TheOnyxDragon12**** This time they are high and on crack**

**Sass on Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	27. To Hazel: Swearing Lately

**To Hazel: Since when do you swear? -** **Precognitive Deathboy **

Hazel: Since Leo taught me

Frank: LEO!

Leo: she wanted to know what the kids 'Slang words' were these days.

Frank: you've could have lied

Leo: I tired

Hazel: No you didn't

Leo: So what if I didn't not like I gave her drugs

Hazel: You did

Frank: LEO!

Leo: Okay, did but it was one time, look she's fine now

Hazel: No I'm not, I'm kidneys suck and my heart rate is up

Leo: Not like I gave her alcohol

Hazel: YES YOU DID, I woke up in-

Leo: *Covers hazels mouth* Hush, no one needs to know about that

Frank: Know about what

Hazel: when I was drunk Leo took me to

Leo: THE BATHROOM, she was throwing up

Hazel: No I wasn't, you took me

Leo: TO THE INFOROMONY, She needed ambrosia and nectar

Hazel: That's not what happened

Frank: JUST TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED

Hazel: Okay, so I asked for a ginger ale, Leo gave me beer, then

I got drunk and then he took me to *coughs*

Leo: dry throat

Hazel: *Nods*

Leo: Here take this *Hands liquid*

Hazel: Thank you *Drinks liquid* I feel dizzy *Passes out*

Frank: . . .

Frank: you spiked it didn't you

Leo…

Leo: Yes

Leo: I used more than normal

Frank: I'm done *walks away*

* * *

**Hello people of the world, so what should I say. Oh yeah I'm not be posting new**

**Chapters every other day I as usually do.**

**1)Because I'm focusing on my other story that I'm doing**

**2)Because I'm sick as hell, like I'm just throwing up all over place.**

**So yeah I'll try to pit up another chapter tomorrow, no guarantees **

**Sass On Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	28. To Jason: Thanking People

**To Jason: Don't you have someone to thank for helping out new Rome- someonecreatedititwasntmehahaha**

Jason: You know what I do

Reyna: FINNALY

Jason: *Turns to face Percy and Reyna*

Jason: Reyna

Reyna: *Smiles* Yes Jason

Jason: Move your blocking my sunlight

Reyna: *mutters* son of a bit*h

Jason: Now I'd like to thank the person who has kept New Rome Strong through the worst time, The person who lead them to find a new light and new hope of something bigger and better. And kept everything in order while i was gone.

Jason: *faces Percy*Percy Thank you so much. Here *holds black cape* have this Honey Cape of New Rome that only the highest person can ever wear

Percy: *Takes Cape* OH MY GODS. I LOOK LIKE BATMAN *goes around ship singing batman theme song*

Reyna; WHAT, YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME HIM *Points at Percy pretending to be batman*

Jason; Yes him. What did you do while I was gone huh Reyna

Reyna: *speechless*

Jason: Thought so *Walks away*

Reyna: BETCH YOU GET BACK HERE, YOU KNOW I HAD TO STOP OCTIVAN FROM KILLING EVERYONE; I SHOULD HAVE THE CAPE NOT HIM. ME *points to self*

Jason: Jealousy is an ugly color on you Reyna

Reyna: I will kill you grace

Percy: *pushes Reyna* Batman saved your life Grace

Jason: He saved a life Reyna. Did you save a life?

Reyna: IVE SAVED LIVES

Jason: mm

Reyna: that's it, in getting that cape AND NO BETCH WILL STOP ME

Percy: You can't defeat Batman

Reyna: gimme the cape *tackles Percy* GIMME THE CAPE

Percy: ROBIN STOP HER

Nico: No, I like senseless violence

Reyna: YOUR NEXT DEATH BREATH

Nico: Il proprio la tua Percy, sto diventando l'inferno fuori di qui *runs away*

Percy: COWARD

Reyna: *kicks Percy* GIMME THE CAPE

Percy: NO

Reyna: *kicks Percy again* NOW

Percy; FINE, BATMAN LOSES, *Sobs* my side hurts

Reyna: THAT'S RIGHT BETCHS DON'T MESS WITH ME *Sits in random throne*

Frank: how did that throne get here? How did you get here? Is it just me that wonders this stuff like Percy should have won how did you win, like that cape shouldn't even excites.

Everyone: . . .

Frank: Just me… Okay

* * *

**HELLO PEOPLE OF THE WORLD. I'm sorry I haven't been on all week, I was sick and all but I got better so yay, also I saw TFIOS YESTERDAY. BEST MOVIE EVER. Like it was spot on with book it was the best film adaption I've ever seen. I cried so much, my friend cried even harder, it was so good I love it. Also I've been writing another fan fiction to (not Jason and the bird kids) so yeah. Bye**

**Sass on Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods**


	29. To Jason: Look at what i'm wearing

**To Jason:*wears purple shirt with 'PERCABETH FOREVA' written in aqua with a picture of Percy and Annabeth inside a heart* TAKE THIS! *points to shirt*- Lady Musicz**

Jason: *Fly's in room wearing orange shirt with 'PERNICO FOREVA' written in red with a picture of Percy and Nico inside a heart holding hands*

Nico: How the f*ck did you get that

Jason: *ignores Nico* *Gasps* Excuse Me Lady, but Percabeth is goanna end and Pernico will be FOREVA, Mam SO GO BACK TO YOUR GIRLY HOME

Nico: How do you know it's a teenage girl and not a 40 yr. Perv? HOW DO WE KNOW THAT THERE ALL NOT JUST A BUNCH OF PERVS

Jason: Well geez I just guess-

Nico: WHAT IF THERE OUT TO KILL US OR SEXUALLY HARRSS US, IVE BEEN GETTING EMAILS FOR PEOPLE CALLED ''FANGIRLS'' WHO WANT AND I QUOTE 'GET WITH ME' YOU KNOW HOW SCARY THAT IS

Percy: You've been getting those to LIKE HOW DO THEY KNOW WHO I AM, AND THEY KEEP ASKING ME TO MARRY THEM

Leo: ME TO MAN, LIKE HOLLY SCHIT AND SOMETIMES ITS JUST ONE LONG PARAGRAPH ABOUT HOW SORRY THEY ARE ABOUT MY CHILDHOOD, LIKE WTF HOW DO YOU KNOW MY CHILDHOOD

Frank: I JUST GOT ONE RIGHT NOW *shows phone * LOOK

Jason: I never got emails like those

Nico: Holly schist, I'm so freaking scared THEY KNOW WHERE WE LIVE, WHO WE ARE! THEY KNOW EVERYTHING, WERE ALL GOING TO DIE FROM THEM

Percy: Well if we're going to I have one thing to say to you Nico

Nico: Yes Percy

Percy: Will you- *hears breathing behind* WTF JASON

Jason: PERNICO FOR EVA *Screams like a little girl* ITS HAPPENIN. EVERYONE COME AND WATCH WITH ME

Leo: JASON, Calm down

Jason: I CANT MAN I CANT, IT ALL HAPENIN RIGHT NOW AT THIS MOMENT IT WILL BE OFFICAIL

Leo: *whispers to self-* the Fangirls said this would happened, something's going down right now

Jason: *breathes heavily* LEO, SING A WEDDING SONG SO THAT WE CAN TRASPOERT TO A WEDDING

Leo: No, last time I almost died

Jason: DOO ITTT

Leo: fine *sings wedding song*

Wedding room scene

*Percy and Nico in suits at the alter*

Coach Hedge: this again, well alright. Do you Perseus Jackson take Nico **Bi** Angelo as your dead breath, weirdo, and lonely husband

Nica **BI** Angelo: THAT'S NOT MY NAME GOAT MAN

Percy: ANNNAAABEEETTTHHH, where are we

Jason: she only answers to ''I Do'' now Percy

Percy: Oh Okay, I Do

Annabeth: WTF, Percy you idoit *face plants*

Coach Hedge: Do You, Nica **Bi **Angelo take this idoit as your husband

Nica **BI** Angelo: N-

Jason: HE DOSE

Coach Hedge: you're now married

Jason: YES, FINNALY I TOLD YOU THEY WOULD END, PIPER I WON THE FREAKING BET, PAY UP

Piper: fine, *pays Jason* * mutters to self-* ill just make them get a divorce

Percy: Annabae, why are you hitting yourself

Annabeth: cause some idiot married my retard.

* * *

**Days and times like these, I don't know what going through my head. I hoped you enjoyed this temporally marriage. Also does anyone want to hear about my personal life? No. I don't care I'm telling you anyways**

**So this week on Tuesday I had so many freaking test on the same day, I swear there was like three or four of them. So of course, I failed since I was sick all week and only had (my friend came by and gave me her books to study with) two days to effing study. Then my last teacher came up to me and was all like '' geez Elaine, what have you been doing all week. You weren't certainly busy with anything'' Like first of all I was sick, second I have other things like sports and stuff to do and third I WAS HOME ALL WEEK HOW COULD I HAVE POSSIBLY KNOWN. So now I really hate that teacher. Stupid Finals**

**Sass on Everyone**

_**-Divergentdemigods**_


	30. To Annabeth: Divorce?

**To Annabeth: Are you going to make Percy get a divorce?-Tswift1fan**

Annabeth: No, I'm just going to let them live a happy life together; adopt kids while I go marry Leo

Leo: YES, finally a girl acutely wants me

Calypso; It was sarcasm dumbass, and you know IM RIGHT HERE BTW

Leo: so what you just pop up anytime I flirt with someone

Calypso: Yes

Annabeth: Yes, of course I a-

Jason; NO, I WORKED TO HARD FOR THIS. I FORBID IT

Annabeth: You tricked them; they don't want to be married

Jason: YES THEY DO THERE HAPPY TOGETHER

Annabeth: ONE OF THEM DOSENT EVEN KNOW THERE MARRIED

Jason: SO WHAT

Annabeth: YOU'RE OBSESSION ISNT HEALTHY

Jason: IM NOT OBESSED

Annabeth: YES YOU ARE, LOOK AT YOUR SELF YOU'RE A MESS

Jason: I CAN CONTROL IT

Annabeth; NO YOU CANT, ITS CONTROLING YOU, YOU NEED HELP

Jason; HOW

Annabeth; I don't know, have Frick frack with Piper. Just because I'm smart DOSE NOT MEAN I KNOW EVERYTHING

Jason: THEN WHO DOSE, SMARTASS

Annabeth: I DUNNO, STOP YELLING AT ME YOU DUMB BLONED

Jason: *continues yelling* YOU STOP FIRST

Annabeth: NO YOU FIRST

Jason: YOU FIRST

Jason/Annabeth: *continues yelling at each other*

Piper; so this is how blondes fight, interesting

Leo: look there pulling each other's hair

Hazel: Frank passes the popcorn

Frank: *passes popcorn* this is amazing, now there insulting each other

Annabeth: YOU CRAZY WANNABE EFFING PRINCE

Jason: AT LEAST I AM A REAL PRINCE WHILE YOU HAVE TO MARRY ONE

Annabeth: OH SHUT UP, AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE AN AFFAIR WITH A ROCK

Piper; I KNEW IT

Jason: I DON'T

Percy: oh now it's a fist fight

Piper: Moneys on Annabeth

Frank: I put mine on Jason

Annabeth/Jason: I HATE YOU *Walks in different directions of each other*

Percy: Well that was-

Piper: Fascinating, there needs to be more fighting for me watch. This ship can be my own drama show except I'm not in any drama

Leo: Piper, what are you thinking

Piper: yes, yes MY PLANS PERFECT. EVERYONE WILL GET INTO FIGHT AND I WILL WATCH FROM BEHINED *Laughs evilly*

Leo: Well I'm getting out of here before schist gets real.

* * *

**Has anyone watched that YouTube video ''sherk is love, sherk is life''? Just asking cause I just watched and it is extremely creepy. **

**Sass on everyone**

**-Divergent Demigods**


	31. To Jason: Obsessed Much

**To Jason: When Did You Become So Obsessed With Pernico?-Precognitive Deathboy**

Jason: *looks extremely annoyed* for the last time. IM NOT OBSESSED

Annabeth: *look extremely annoyed at Jason* for the last time YES YOU ARE

Jason: I'm a fanboy who just happens to intensify my ships is that so bad?

Annabeth: YES, It becomes bad when you force them TO GET MARRIED

Jason: I DON'T SEE WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS

Hazel: if were taking about their marriage, I'd like to say I haven't seen both them ever since

Piper: Yeah, were are they

Jason: . . .

Annabeth: JASON

Jason: . . . I'm not telling you . . .

Hazel: *grabs Jason by the shirt*TELL US WHERE MY DEATHBOY BROTHER IS

Jason: NEVER, I SWEAR I WOULD NEVER TELL WERE THAT PRECOGNITIVE BOY IS

Annabeth/Hazel/Jason: *Continues Fighting*

Piper: * watches from comfy seat* yes, fight, fight till the death * eats popcorn*

Leo: WAIT. Precognitive Deathboy wasn't that the guy who asked us this question

Annabeth: well yeah, so what

Leo: Sooo who else do we know is both of those things?

Everyone but Annabeth: *Dumbstruck*

Leo: NICO, Which means Nico, asked us this question Precognitive Deathboy IS NICO. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEAN

Annabeth; that you're delusional

Leo: THAT PEOPLE FORM CHB IS ASKING US QUESTIONS, YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

Leo: THAT MEANS SOMEONE WHOS SMART MUST BE RULE GIRL

Annabeth; He just went to crazy town everyone

Leo: ANNABETHS RULE GIRL *Faces Annabeth* How dare you mess with me rule girl

Annabeth: I'm not your so called 'Rule Girl'

Leo: LIES, HOW DARE YOU TOURMENT ME SO HARSHLY

Annabeth; why would I torment you, we barely even talk to each other

Leo; But your smart

Annabeth: No schist I thought I was stupid

Leo: you're not though. Right?

Annabeth: *Face palms* Think about it dumbass, who would want to torment you, someone who has always put you down,Someone who always shows up randomly, someone who hates it when you flirt with other girls

Leo: I KNOW EXCATLY WHO IT IS

Annabeth: good, for second there I thought you were stupid-

Leo: IT'S FRANK

Annabeth: I take every single word I just said back

Leo: HE HATES IT WHEN I FLIRT WITH HAZEL, HE ALWAYS PUT ME DOWN WITH HIS SASS AND SHOWS UP RANDOMLY AT THE END OF EVERYTHING

Hazel: It's not frank

Leo: Yeah it is just watch at the end he's going to say something sassy or smart. Just wait

The seven wait

Frank: Excuse me sir, I do not show up randomly at the end to say something Sassy or Smart, I am fulltime member so go and do my Laundry Peasant

Leo: HA, TOLD ALL OF YOU

Frank: HA I'm not the end Peasant. . . Schist

* * *

_**Hello People of the world, I'm sorry I have not posted in such a long vie been pretty busy with life and everything. So now that its summer I will hopefully be updating more often and all. And also can you guys vote on my poll about two stories that I wish to start very soon but I can't decide which one to do first so yeah.**_

_**Sass on Everyone**_

_**-Divergent demigods**_


	32. To Both Camps: Lets torture octivan

**To Both mother f**king camps: Hello there, I am Violet daughter of Apollo and I was wondering EVERYONE would you like to join the I hate Octavian club we recently captured him and are planning to torture him for burning and stabbing our closest friends stuffy, beary, mimy, and tiny would you be happy to join us to bring justice to the world?**

Jason: *Faces Reyna* Reyna, did you have something to do with this

Reyna: * wears I hate Octavian t-shirt** hold 'torture Octavian' sign* No

Jason: Really

Reyna: Can you honestly blame me,

Leo: WAIT, Octavian is the guy I took up to the ship to look around right

Reyna: Yeah

Leo: K, I'm in LETS TORTURE THIS BITCH

Reyna: YES, Anyone else

Frank: IM IN, IM SETTING HIM ON FIRE

Hazel: AND ILL TAKE HIM TO HELL

Reyna: Jason would you like to join us

Jason: I don't know, wont we get in trouble by lupa or something

Hazel: of course not

Frank: come join us Jason

Reyna: yes come join the dark side with us, you know you want to * holds out hand*

Jason: okay then * takes Reyna's hand*

Piper: if you do not let go in the next three seconds someone is going to die

Reyna: back off, you can't control him. You're not married or anything

Piper: * Laughs* we are *shows ring*

Reyna: WHAT, WHEN, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME. WERE SUPPOSED TO BE FRIENDS

Jason: To be honest-

Reyna: AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN INVITE ME

Jason: The wedding just kind happened, I didn't even know till it did

Reyna: I CANT BELIVVE THIS. JASON YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO TORTURE OCTIVAN

Jason: NO, I NEED TO TORTURE HIM. I COULD USE LIGHTNING AND-

Reyna: NO

Jason: But but-

Reyna: NO, DID ANYONE ELSE GET MARRIED AND DIDN'T INVITE ME

Reyna: FRANK, HAZEL

Frank: NO, *panics* WERE STIL VIRGENS * Covers mouth*

Reyna: * sits awkwardly* I did not need to know that

Hazel: well one of us are

Frank: what do you mean ONE OF US ARE

Hazel: well there was this time in the forties, and I was with Sammy and it just kind of happened

Frank: IT DOESN'T JUST KINDA HAPPENED

Hazel: well it did happened so get over it

Frank: I CAN'T GET JUST OVER SOMETHING LIKE THAT SO QUICKLY

Hazel: JUST DEAL WITH IT

Frank: I can't believe this *Walks away*

Leo: So, are we going to torture Octavian or what

Everyone: . . .

Leo: Okay, anyone know where Nico, Percy and Annabeth are

Everyone: . . .

Leo: Tough crowd

* * *

**Hello People of the world. Violet I would love to join you and torture octivan cause that sounds like fun. Anyways do any of you guys know some good Beta readers you could recommend/direct me to. Thanks**

**Sass on Everyone**

**-DivergentDemigods **


	33. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON

**Happy Birthday Jason- The Fandom**

Everyone but Percy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON *give out lightning shaped cake*

Jason: Wow thanks you guys

Piper: Oh it was nothing; you know I just planed every little thing to for my wonderful husband's birthday party no need to thank me.

Jason: wasn't going to anyways

Piper: Blow out your dam candles

Jason: *Blows out candles*

Leo: Yay now let's eat

Piper; yes let's all eat the cake that I worked real hard to make all day No one needs to thank me

Jason: . . .

Piper; just eat your gods dam cake

Everyone: *east cake*

Annabeth: so how old are you Jason?

Jason: Hmm I can't remember

Annabeth: Well that's okay I can figure it out. Thaila left when you were two and she was eight right, so she's six years older than you. So just subtract six from whoever old is

Leo: *coughs* smart ass * cough*

Annabeth: *glares at Leo* so how old are you Thaila

Thaila: I don't know, I think I'm 20

Annabeth; when were you born?

Thaila: I forget

Annabeth: *face palms * Do you remember when Jason was born

Thaila; I also forgot that

Annabeth; *Mutters to self-* I'm friends with an idoit

Thaila: Maybe Zeus knows

Zeus: don't look at me; I don't even know how old I am

Annabeth: is it really that hard to remember your birthday

**(AN; so I made them have family names okay, I think you guys can guess who's who)**

Lighting: *looks at each other* Yes

Annabeth: oh my gods I give up

Hades: At least I know how old I am

Nico/Hazel: Same

Lighting; Then how old are you

Nico: Easy, I'm 90 Hazels 84 and Father's 3192

Lighting: *eyes widen* you're old

Death: And you're stupid

Oceans: so we know how old we are in case you-

Death and Lighting: NO ONE CARES

Oceans; Harsh

Frank: *Dressed in Canada day clothes* so it also Canada's day but does anyone care. NO. THEY ONLY CARE ABOUT JASON AND HIS FREAKING AGE. *walks away*

* * *

**So happy birthday Jason and HAPPY CANDAIANS DAY FRANK. And yeah that pretty much it.**

**Sass on everyone**

**-Divergent demigods**


	34. To: Leo,Reyna and Thaila: Perfect Couple

**To Leo, Thalia, Nico, and Reyna: how does it feel to be surrounded by perfect couples- HollDoll150**

Thaila: Let me know when you find some

Reyna: all I see is just a bunch of messes

Leo: And guess who has to live with them

Jasper: Were not that bad

Thaila: Really

Jasper: Really

Thaila: Hey Jason the brick called last night asking where you were

Jason: THAILA

Piper: *Holds dagger firmly in hands* I CANT BELIVE YOU JASON, AGAIN WITH THE BRICK I THOUGHT WE WERE PAST THAT

Jason: WE WERE *Glares at Thaila* Trust me I'm not having an affair with the brick

Piper: I never said anything about an affair

Jason: you sure about that

Piper: JASON GRACE YOUR HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH THAT BRICK AGAIN

Jason: I SWEAR PIPER IM NOT, I-

Coach Hedge: Wait, its Jason Grace not Ace

Jason; Yeah why?

Coach Hedge: Oh schist * Walks away rubbing fore head*

Jason; Wired

Piper: not as wired as you f**king a brick

Jason: IM NOT

Jasper: *Continues fighting*

Thaila: My point exactly

Frazel: At least were better,were such a cutter couple

Leo: Yeah cute, more like I CANT TAKE A DAM JOKE

Frazel: We can take a joke

Leo: No you can't, Like seriously. Hazel you trapped me in a block of diamonds for three days. THREE DAYS WITH NOTHING TO EAT CAUSE OF SOME STUPIED JOKE

Hazel: It was hurtful

Leo: AND FRANK, YOU DUMPED ME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN CUASE I USED 'Frankly'' IN ONE GEEZ THEN YOU GUYS ARE SCARED OF EACH OTHER SOMETIMES

Frazel: WERE NOT SCARED OF EACH OTHER

Leo: Yeah and I don't flirt with every girl I see.

Frazel: * Walks up to Leo*

Leo; Yo guys I'm just joking go back over there in your cornner*walks backwards* come one please don't hurt me, you know me guys, i was jokeing

Frazel: You screwed us for the last time * Drags Leo out of room*

Leo: SOMEONE HELP ME, THERE GOING TO KILL ME JASON, PIPER PLEASE SOMEONE *Cry's* IM SORRY IM TO HOT TO DIE, LITTERLY. PLEASE SOMEONE HEP ME.

Annabeth: Wow, I don't think a relationship can be much worse than this

Reyna; I can think of one

Annabeth: Shut up, other than the fact that he's retarded he's the Perfect boyfriends which makes us the perfect couple

Reyna: Oh really, then where is he

Annabeth: He's umm

Reyna: With another boy somewhere where you don't know set up by a another boy who has an Affair with a brick

Annabeth: SHUT UP. Im working on –

Reyna; having them get a divorce

Annabeth: AT LEAST I HAVE A BOYFRIEND WHAT ABOUT YOU, STILL CHASING MARRIED MEN

Reyna: Harsh, AND I DON'T CHASE AROUND MARRIED MEN

Annabeth: Then how did you know Percy got married and that Jason has an affair with a brick huh HOW DO YOU KNOW

Reyna; DON'T JUDGE ME

Annabeth; KINDA TOO LATE FOR THAT, EVERYONE THINKS YOU'RE A CREEPY STALKER

Reyna: SHUT UP, JUST SHUT UP

Annabeth: AND LEO

Leo; *is in full body cast* *Gets wheeled in by frank and Hazel* NO DON'T YOU EVEN START WITH ME

Annabeth: WHY BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA TRY AND FLIRT WITH ME

Leo; . . .

Annabeth; YOU GO AROUND MAKING FUN OF RELATIONSHIPS WHILE YOU CAN'T EVEN STOP YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND FROM MAKING OUT WITH EVERY GUY SHE SEES

Calypso: I'm actually not offended by that

Leo: WELL I UHH-

Annabeth: ADMIT IT BOTH YOU AND YOUR SO CALLED GIRLFRIEND ARE WHORES

Calypso: I'm still not offend by any of this

Leo: Frank, wheel me out please *Sobs*

Frank; *Wheels out Leo*

Thaila: Looks like its someone's time of the month

Annabeth: DON'T YOU EVEN DARE YOU BACKSTABBING B**CH

Thaila: What did I do?

Annabeth: OH YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID

Thaila: *thinks for a minute* Oh, Annabeth I didn't know back then I'm sorry

Annabeth: SORRY DOESN'T CUT IT, AND YOU I CALL YOU MY BEST FRIEND

Hazel: What did she do?

Artemis: Yeah, I wish to know as well

Thaila: Don't you dare tell them, look I'm sorry we dissed you guys but this could get me in serious trouble if you tell

Annabeth; Hmm I don't know should i

Jasper and Frazel: Yes

Thaila; Please Annabeth, I'm begging you don't tell anyone were best friends remember

Annabeth: Yeah, but I really feel like telling a secret

Thaila: Please *gives puppy dog eyes*

Annabeth: Fine

Leo; I didn't realise how angry you get when someone makes fun of you

Annabeth: Then don't make fun of me

* * *

**Hello People of the world, so I just wrote this awesome story called '' The Times Before'' Really good in my opinion so if you could please go check it out. Thx. Also have any of you heard about the song called Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez. I love it. So yeah**

**Sass on Everyone**

_**-DivergentDemigods**_


	35. To Everyone: Nico Girl

**To Everyone-: Do Leo and Nico desperately need really demigod GIRLFRIENDS?  
(Sorry Jason and Calypso)- Demimagician **

Jason: *Wears 'PERNICO IS LIFE' T-shirt *

Jason:NO, HE NEEDS PERCY NOT SOME RANDOM GIRL.

Jason: WHY WOULD HE NEED A GIRLFRIEND WHEN HE HAS PERCY, I MEAN NO ONE IS BETTER THAN HIM. HE HAS LIKE FIVE PEOPLE CRUSHING ON HIM

Jason: I DON'T LIKE YOU, WHO EVER YOU ARE!

Jason: *Phone rings* *Picks up Phone* Jello…. Oh okay *put phone on speaker*

Percy: * through Jason's phone* Thanks Man, your such a great person.

Jason: What?

Percy: You know saying how much better I am then you and how I'm so much hotter then you. And how everyone likes me better then you

Jason: I never said that… People don't like me better then you

Percy: Everyone likes me better then you

Frank: Is it just me but you know, how is it that were not dead because of Jason's phone

Leo: It's like I don't even excite

The Seven: * hears shuffling through Jason's phone*

Nico: You guys need to help, so me and Percy are stuck on an island surrounded by water and were stuck-

Annabeth: Wait, why can't you get Percy to make a wave and leave or something?

Nico: DO YOU THINK IM THAT STUPID TO NOT TRY THAT, EVERYTIME WE TRY THAT WE JUST COME BACK FROM THE OTHER SIDE. GEEZ ANNABETH NO WONDERS JASON SHIP PERNICO!

Annabeth: touché

Nico: So the only way off the island is through the air so you just need to find the island and come get us

Percy: But I don't wanna leave, Jason did all this for us causes were his best friends. Right Jason

Annabeth: *Holds dagger in hand* HE WHAT

Percy: Yeah, he called it a honeymoon whatever that means. It's awesome

Annabeth: A HONEY WHAT-

Percy: A Honeymoon, for a daughter of Athena you're sure not bright, listen better

Annabeth: i swear to the gods Percy, i will OH MY CAZZO GODS PERCY IO TI schiaffo così male per DICENDO CHE ALLA MIA FACCIA. E JASON Io ti farò del male come mai prima. E NICO Se stai giocando a qualche gioco SESSO TERRIFICANTE CON LUI su quell'isola mi taglierò CHE piccolo pene DIRITTO fuori di voi (**A / M non puoi LEGGERE QUESTO POTETE LEGGERE QUESTO. MENO CHE ricerca Questo UP. Oh beh, sarò fregato poi)**

Nico: IT'S TORTURE, PLEASE COME GET US RIGHT AWAY, ALSO When did you learn Italian

Annabeth: When you started saying random things, I know everything you ever said. Everything

Calypso: * Walks into room with on* hey can you guys be quiet you're annoyingly loud-

Leo: How are you here and not on your island, I didn't even flirt with anyone yet?

Calypso: Oh that's easy, Jason said I could stay here for two weeks if I let Percy and Nico have their honeymoon at my island

Annabeth: * Walks up to Jason with dagger* YOU DID WHAT NOW

Jason: Look it only for two weeks, pernico needs to bond and...

Annabeth: *Puts dagger to Jason's neck* Get them back NOW

Nico: YEAH, I can't take it here anymore. Do you realize what we had to eat? BLUE MEAT. WE ATE BLUE MEAT. *sobs* GET ME OFF THIS ISLAND

Calypso: *Laughs* He can't, only I can get them back and I like it here too much to go back so…

Annabeth: NO, Leave go back to your lonely island and bring back my boyfriend

Calypso: No, it boring there, there's like nothing to do there

Annabeth: But I want my boyfriend back

Calypso: And I want to stay with mine

Annabeth: But I don't know the kind of creepy stuff Nico might be doing to him,

Nico: Trust me I'm not the one doing the 'Creepy stuff'

Leo: WAIT, What 'Creepy stuff' is Percy doing

Nico: You don't want to know man, you don't want to know

Annabeth: I still don't trust you, Calypso please I'm begging you

Calypso: No, now I'm going back to my room, Leo lets go

Leo: Okay, Bye everyone * Follows calypso into room*

Annabeth: *Faces Jason* I am going to hurt you and torture you so bad you wished you shipped Percabeth

Jason: He'll be back for your birthday. PLEASE DON'T HURT ME

Annabeth: Oh it's a little too late for that. Piper would like to help me

Piper: *Wears Percabeth T-shirt* my pleasure

* * *

**I am really sorry for being a lazy ass and not updating lately again I'm really sorry. Also how has your summer been lately?**

**Sass on everyone**

_**-Elaine(P.S For all the dumb people who can't tell this is my real name, shocking i know)**_


	36. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNABETH

**Happy Birthday Annabeth- The Fandom**

Annabeth: It's not that happy since Percy's not here *cries into Thaila's shirt*

Thaila: There, there *Pats Annabeth's Back*

Annabeth: Thanks Thaila, you're truly my best friend

Thaila: I know

Piper: Wow, that doesn't hurt

Grover: Yeah, it's not like we weren't there for you

Thaila: Yeah, But did you help her out when she was heart broken

Piper/Grover: YES!

Thaila: Whatever, I'm still her best friend

Leo: So for your birthday I made a video slideshow of you and Percy

*Slideshow Plays*

Annabeth: *Cries Harder*

Thaila: Way to go idiot

Leo: That's not nice to say to your future husband

Thaila: for the last time IM A HUNTER I CANT GET MARRIED

Leo: Sure you can't *Winks at Thaila*

Thaila: ARTEMIS HELP ME

Apollo: She's busy but I'm free to help you anytime. Especially in bed *Winks at Thaila*

Frank: *Covers Hazels Ears* THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE. IM VERY ASHMED AT YOU APOLLO.I GET THAT THAILAS HOT AN ALL BUT BE CAREFUL WERE YOU SAY YOUR PICKUP LINES *Walks away with Hazels ears still covered*

Thaila: IM NOT EVEN THAT HOT

Apollo/ Leo: Yes you are

Annabeth: You know Percy called me hot once *Cries even harder*

Thaila: WOULD YOU STOP PLEASE, Okay Piper give her your gift

Piper: I got you this grey cardigan and this sea-green sweater since I know how much you like those colors

Annabeth: *sniffles* thanks piper, your my second best friend

Grover: what am I chop liver

Annabeth: you know what else is sea-green, Percy's eyes. Percy's eyes are so beautiful. I WISH HE WAS HERE *Cries Harder into Thaila's shirt*

Thaila: Did someone get her a gift that doesn't remind her of Percy.

Everyone. . .

Thaila: Well that's great, Jason what about you. You must have something that doesn't remind her of him.

Jason: I have this *Gives Owl Necklace*

Annabeth: Thanks, you know Percy gave me an owl bracelet once. *Cries even more* I MISS PERCY

Thaila: Way to go Sparky. Anyone else wants to ruin her birthday. Where's Death Breath I'm sure he would love to ruin this even more.

Nico: *Bust through door wearing a Hawaiian shirt dragging Percy by the collar *

Nico: IM BACK BITCHES

Percy: but Nica, I didn't want to leave it was just getting fun

Nico: WHERES JASON AND ANNABETH *Sees Annabeth with Thaila*

Thaila: What Th-

Nico: TAKE IT, IT'S A DIVORCE PAPER *Gives Annabeth Percy* TAKE THIS TO

Annabeth: *Kisses Percy* Thank you so much Nico

Jason: NO, I FORBID IT, IVE WORKED TO HARD AND WAITED TO LON-

Nico: *turns head very scary towards Jason* did you realize what I had to put up with for two weeks. ''Nica lets go to the pool, Nica what should I wear, Nica lets eat blue meat'' BLUE MEAT JASON, TWO WHOLE WEEKS. TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME*Cries into hazels shirt*

Percy: Geez, I just wanted to eat blue food. *walks out of room*

Nico: and to make sure I never have to be with him again, I signed a marriage form with your name on it. NOW YOULL KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO LIVE WITH HIM

Annabeth: wow Nico thanks. This is the best birthday present ever *Hugs Nico*

Nico: I Meant Jason

Annabeth: wait what

Nico: Jason and Percy are now married

Everyone: WHAT

Piper: but I'm married to Jason

Nico: No, Coach wrote his name wrong you're married to Jason Ace while Percy married to Jason Grace

Jason/Piper: COACH

Coach: WHAT, THEY SOUND VERY SIMILAR

Jason: NO ITS DOSENT RACE AND GRACE SOUNDS A LOT MORE SIMILAR. RACE WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER MISTAKE

Coach: IT WAS A MISTAKE GET OVER IT, THINK OF THE BRIGHT SIDE. YOU CAN GET RID THAT WITCH

Piper: IM NOT A WITCH

Jason: Could have fooled me

Piper: EXCUSE ME

Nico: *Laughs evenly* NOW YOU'RE STUCK WITH HIM

The Seven, The Gods and Both Mother F*cking camps: *stares at Nico*

Annabeth: *Quietly sings while crying* Happy fml birthday to me, Happy Fml birthday to me

Thaila: IT WAS A JOKE YOU STUPID FATES, CANT YOU GUYS TAKE A JOKE FOR ONCE

Hazel: Soo Jercy

Frank: eh why not *Wears Jercy T-shirt*

* * *

**But you didn't see that one coming.**

_**-Elaine**_


	37. To Jason: What's it Like being Married?

**To Jason: how does it feel to be married to Percy?-Ellz42**

Leo: *Narrows eyes* Oh, it's her *Walks away*

Jason: Wired, really wired

Jason: It's just… wired

Leo: *comes back* Like how wired

Jason: you know how he used to hate me right?

Leo: right

Jason: well now he acts like were best friends and he only talks about rings and stuff

Leo: hmm, I see. Would you like to lay down on the couch?

Jason: yeah *lays down on couch* thanks

Leo: So how do you feel about this new relationship?

Jason: well its very different form my past ones

Leo: Hmm *writes stuff on clipboard* how different

Jason: well my first relationship was kind of one sided, I didn't like her but she liked me and it was extremely awkward hanging out with her.

Leo: So a clingy one *writes down*

Jason: The second one was kind great, up until the point we got married then we started fighting a lot about my past relationships and she started looking through my stuff, well mostly my phone.

Leo: Hmm, Anther clingy one

Jason: And before that I had this off and on relationship with this… on a second thought I refuse to talk about that

Leo: I see now, let's assume that this one is also very clingy *continues to write stuff down* what do you think the rings mean

Jason: I honestly don't know, he said he talked about it with Nico on the island but that's about it

Leo: is that so, how do yo-

Calypso: LEO

Leo: schist,

Calypso: are you being a therapist again?

Leo: Yes, yes I am

Calypso: I told to give up on that,

Leo: And I didn't… SO WHAT

Calypso: Leo, how many times do I have to tell you? You can't be: A doctor, A lawyer, A Therapist, A Chief-

Leo: I GET IT

Calypso: Good

Leo: I CAN BE A COP

Calypso: What, no that's not what I said

Leo: Yes I can see it now *dose hand gesture* Leo the Cop

Calypso: No no no

Leo: I know my phrase '' You're going downtown , downtown to tarturaus'' oh my gods then I can use the celeste bronze guns on monsters

Calypso: That's not what I meant, please stop

Leo: Now I need monster sized handcuffs and were good to go

Calypso: How do you honestly get a Cop from what I said? Seriously

Leo: This is an awesome idea, you're the best Calypso

Calypso: I don't understand anymore

Jason: I'm still here, I still need a therapist

Frank: Okay

Frank: Get up and get you schist together, Advice from Doctor Frank


	38. To Nico: Where are you!

**To Nico: WHERE ARE YOU!?- Iwovepizza**

Nico: …

Nico: ….

Nico: ….

Nico: No

Nico: ...

Nico: ...

Nico:...

Nico: Yeah, No

* * *

**The End Of this very short chapter**


	39. To Leo:CALYPSO LOVES ME NOT YOU HAHAHAHA

**To Leo,**  
**I'm on Ogygia. Calypso chose me. She hates you. What are you to do about it? –Precognitive Deathboy**

Leo:…

Leo:…

Leo:….

Piper: Are, are you okay

Leo: no

Leo: How could I have not notice?

Leo: it was so clear

Piper: What Is?

Leo: NICOS FREAKING BI

Jason: WAIT WHAT

Leo: I KNOW RIGHT, I ALWAYS THOUGHT HE WAS JUST GAY BUT TURNS OUT HES BI

Percy: bi little bitch

Annabeth: no, just no

Jason: WAIT DOES THAT MEAN HE WANT TO F*CK EVERYONE HE SEES OR JUST HOT PEOPLE

Piper: f*cking stereotypes

Leo: GODS HE THINKS IM HOT

Jason: ME TO, WIAT DOES HE STILL THINK PERCYS HOT OR NOT

Leo: NICA IS PERCY BAE OR NOOOOT*tsk noise*

Nico: wtf

Jason: we know your bi NICA

Nico: first of MY NAMES NOT NICA SECONED, I'm not bi

Leo: so you're full on gay

Nico: *blushes* I'm not gay

Hazel: MR,FIZZLES CAN TELL THAT YOU'RE BEING A LIAAAR

Percy: what?

Frank: *shivers like a scared cat* She's, she's been wat-wacthing S-s-supernatural

Hazel:*looks at Nico sincerely* There are two things I know for certain. One: Bert and Ernie are gay. Two: you are not goanna die a virgin, not on my watch.

Nico: WHAT THE HADES HAZEL

Hazel: now look at Percy and say this to him 'I would love to have the sex with you.'

Nico: NO, HAZEL GO AWAY WITH FRANK AND WATCH YOUR HELLNATURAL

Hazel: it's SUPERNATURAL

Nico: THERE IN HELL MOST OF THE TIME ANYWAYS

Jason: NOOO, YOU HAVE TO STAHP. YOU NEED TO SAY THAT SO PERNICO CAN HAPPEN STOP BEING A SELFISH BITCH NICA, WHAT ABOUT MY HAPPINESS NICA. EVER THOUGHT OF THAT YOU SELFISH BRAT

Nico: WHAT ABOUT MY HAPPINESS

Leo:no gives a f*ck about that Nica

Nico: nice to know you care *rolls eyes*

Jason: PERCY IS YOUR BAE NICA YOU MUST GET RE-MARRIED

Nico: sometimes I'm happy Obama won then things like this happen and I wish Romany won

Annabeth: OH MY GODS NICA, YOU'RE A REPUBLICAIN, PERCY CAN YOU BELIVE THIS

Percy: YOU LIKE THE RED PEOPLE

Annabeth: republican Percy, I taught you this already

Percy: I CANT BELIVE WE WERE EVER MARRIED, IF I KOWN I WOULD NEVER HAD SAY YES

Annabeth: YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW UNTIL I TOLD YOU

Percy: WHATEVER

Jason: PERNICO FOREVER

Hazel: WINCEST FOREVER

Jason: THAT TO

* * *

**Red people**

**I don't want to sound self centered or anything but I'm awesome**

_**Sass on everyone**_

_**~Divergentdemigods**_


	40. To Jason: I'm Not Nico

**To Jason,  
1\. Bae means poop in Danish. 2. I'M NOT NICO!-Precognitive Deathboy**

Jason: I never thought that. That was Leo

Leo: Sup

Jason: and I'm pretty sure you're wrong about that Danish thing

Annabeth: and you would know that because?

Jason: I'm part Danish

Piper: What?

Piper: Why was I not informed with this?

Jason: It never came up

Piper: omgs Jason, you need to tell me this stuff. We were married for crying out loud!

Reyna: aww it wittle pippa sad cause she doesn't know anything about Jason

Piper: Pippa?

Reyna: Yeah that's your name right

Piper: No…

Reyna: well it doesn't matter your just a peasant and I'm a queen

Piper: I'm not peasen-

Reyna: Omgs Sass king that peasant is speaking to me

Nico: Stupid peasants, don't know there place in this world

Piper: What the f*ck Nico, you're not a ki-

Nico: SASS QUEEN ITS TAKLING

Hazel: OMGS, WHAT SHOULD WE DO WITH THIS-THIS THING

Piper: IM A PERSON

Reyna: The White Trash thinks it a person Lol

Annabeth: stop using text talk, it's annoying

Piper: I'm not even white, I'm _Native_

Nico: to trash

Piper: I swear to the gods

Hades: Please don't, we only help people and demigods not Native Trash so please go back to where you came from

Piper: * swears* Hades

Hades: Yes

Piper:….

Hail Queen Reyna: Oh look, it knows its place now

Sass King: Oh good I could not take its stupidity

Hail Queen Reyna: Same

Piper: Well now we know that Jason doesn't like annoying idiots who don't know the difference between sass and trash

Hail Queen of Rome:

Sass King: Reyna. Leave.

Sass King: Like right now

Sass King: I Need water, someone get me water

Sass King: Way too much second-hand embarrassment

Piper: *Points at Door* There's the door or do you need an escort for your giant ego

Sass Queen: Burn

Hail Queen Reyna: Sorry but I think you've mistaken my ego for your annoying personality

Persassy: Ohhhhhhh

Bad Boy Supreme: And Reyna takes the lead, how will Piper out sass her?

Piper: Isn't it rather dangerous to use one's entire vocabulary in one sentence

Persassy: SLAY PIPER, SLAY

Hail Queen Reyna: Funny I was going to say the same thing about you

Frank: WIN THIS BATTLE FOR ROME

Piper: Oh sorry was I supposed to be offended

Bad Boy Supreme: YASS, SLAY THAT BITCH PIPER

Sass King: The Sass Queen and Sass God have been talking and we have decided-

Sass Queen: Reyna you have been demoted to Reysass and Piper is now Piper McFab

Sass King: What she said

Annabeth: You've got to be kidding me, did we really just sit through a boring sass contest with very low IQ comebacks.

Everyone: . . .

Annabeth: You know what; it's pointless to make fun of you because it will take you the rest of the day to understand what I said. *walks away*

Everyone:. . . .

Sass King: Piper your back to Piper same with you Reyna

Sass King: Also Annabeth's now AnnaFab Chase

Sass King: I'm done now

Sass King: Where is my Water?

Sass King: I Asked for f*cking water ten minutes ago

Sass King: SOMEONE GET ME WATER RIGHT NOW

Sass King:DO YOU REALIZE HOW THIRSTY I AM RIGHT NOW

Sass King: I AM SO THIRSTY RIGHT NOW

Sass King: I AM DRINKING MY OWN SALIVA OF HOW THIRSTY I AM

Sass King: I NEED WATER IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW

Sass King: SO F*CKING THIRSTY

Jason: FOR PERCY!1!1!1!

Sass King: Go F*ck yourself

Sass King:*mutters to self-* piece of white trash

* * *

**HI**

**Can we all just pretend that percy is back with Annabeth and everything's back to normal and no one's married cause I'm just kind of over it now and don't feel like focusing on it. Okay thanks**

_**Sass on Everyone**_

_**-Divergentdemigods**_


	41. HAPPY BIRTHDAY PERCY

Happy Birthday Percy-The Fandom

Percy: It's my Birthday?

Annabeth: What is with you and forgetting your birthday?

Percy: I don't know?

Leo: #blameiton ADHD

Percy: omg, yass brah

Annabeth: stop using text talk people ITS EFFING ANNOYING

Percy: Well since it's my birthday I can talk however I want

Annabeth: Whatever, but we have to go now

Percy: why?

Annabeth: cause everyone's waiting for us

Percy: Why?

Annabeth: Cause it's you birthday

Percy: Why?

Annabeth: because you were born

Percy: Why?

Annabeth: because sally and your daddy were horny, they then made the dumbest child ever

Nico: SLAY ANNABETH SLAY

Percy: Geez Annabeth, it was just a question

******_Percy and Annabeth go into the gathering room (that Leo had just made the other day) were everybody was waiting. The Gods, Camp Jupiter, Camp Half-Blood even Paul and Sally were there_******

Everyone but Jason: HAPPY BIRTHDAY PERCY

Zeus: Say happy birthday to Percy son,

Jason: Uhh No

Zeus: and why not

Jason: Cause

Zeus: Cause what

Jason: Cause NO ONE WAS HERE FOR MY BIRTHDAY

Jason: WHERE WERE YOU CAMP JUPITER HUH

Reyna: we would've came but you were shipping something disgusting so we didn't come

Octavian: LIES

Octavian: We didn't come because 1) YOU WERE ACOIATEING WITH GREEKS and 2) Reyna is still a jealous bitch

Reyna: I AM NOT JEALOUS

Octavian: AND I DON'T KILL STUFFED ANIMALS FOR A LIVING

Reyna: stfu Octavian

Annabeth: I Swear….

Octavian: Fine, I'll just go over there *points to corner of the room* and just kill some more teddy bears okay

Percy: Wow thanks for coming you guys, you know I was going to write a speech today since I thought my birthday was tomorrow

Poseidon: Sally dear, wear you ever going to teach the boy his Birthday

Sally: Don't you think I've tried, maybe if he had a farther figure to look up to his life he would've been a lot smarter. But for some reason Olympus won't allow it.

Sally: But that's not my problem

Hades: SALLY YOU ARE NOW SALSASS

Sally: excuse you

Sally: I AM THE GODESS OF SASS

Sally: you piece of trash

The Gods: OHHHHHH

Apollo: HADES GOT HIS ASS KICKED BY A MORTAL

Artemis: *slaps Apollo* Shut your mouth, There are children here

Apollo: There sixteen

Leo: EXCEPT FOR MY BABY BRO HARLEY!

Leo: HARLEY IS FIVE AND THE CUTEST KID YOU EVER MEET

Leo: AINT THAT RIGHT

Harley: *looks up* oh umm, Hi *waves hand adorably* I'm Harley and I'm this many *put up hand* and Leo is my Big Brother

Aphrodite Kids/All the Girls in the room: OMGS HES SO CUTE,

Harley: *blushes* Tank you, *Sneeze adorably* Sorwy, I'm wittle sick. Also I have one of teeth out

Aphrodite Kids/All the Girls in the room: OMG SNEEZE AGAIN PLEASE THAT WAS SO CUTE.

Harley: *sneeze's adorably again* Leo I'm tiwred *yawns*

Leo: That's alright baby bro, I'll take you to my cabin and you can sleep there *picks up Harley*

Aphrodite Kids/All the Girls in the room: IM GONNA FAINT WITH HOW CUTE THAT IS LEO CARYING HIS BABY BROTHER, AND PUTTING HIM TO SLEEP

Lacy: Hey, umm Leo *giggles* do you umm have a girlfriend?

Drew: What no, Lacy HE'S MINE

Lacy: NO YOU SAID YOU LIKED JASON

Jason: *head goes up* wait for real no joke right

Drew: NO I DON'T, JASON SHIPS PERNICO TALK ABOUT TURN OFF

Lacy: omgs ikr

Annabeth: I'm this close *fingers or close to each other* this close to about killing someone right now

Drew: Plus Leo Is Super Cute

Lacy: So Cute

Leo: Shh, Harleys sleeping right now

Drew/Lacy: I'm going to die soon

Leo: I'll let you guys see him sleep if you give me 20 dollars

Drew/Lacy: *gives Leo money*

Leo: *come on in ladies*

Jason: What, How? This isn't fair; I want girls falling for me like that

Piper: Is that so *holds kingie*

Jason: NO, I ONLY WANT YOU BABE

Piper: Shut up YOU CHEAT

Jason: IM NOT CHEATING ON YOU

Piper: PLEASE I SAW THE WAY YOU LOOKED AT HARLEY

Jason: HES FIVE AND ADORABLE

Piper: YOU NEVER CALL ME ADORABLE

Jason: THAT'S CAUSE YOUR ALWAYS LOOKING THROUGH MY STUFF

Jason: *mutters to self-* should've brought drew

Piper: SO NOW YOU WANT MY SISTER

Jason: NO, I NEVER SAID THAT

Piper: NO YOU SO WANT HER

Jason: NO I DON'T. ME LOVE YOU

Piper: WHAT DOES SHE HAVE THAT I DON'T

Jason: NOTHING YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL AND AMAZING

Piper: THEN WHY WERE YOU LOOKING AT HER

Jason: I WASN'T

Piper: JUST TELL ME

Jason: FINE SHES CRUVYER

Piper: UGH, IM CRUVIER THEN THAT SKINY LITTLE BITCH

Drew: you wish

Piper: UGH IM GLAD WERE DIVEROCE

Jason: SAAME

Annabeth: SHUT UP PERCY HAS SOMETHING TO SAY

Percy: What?

Annabeth: You had a speech, remember

Percy: Oh Yeah

Percy: AS I WAS SAYING BEFORE I WAS RUDELY INTERUPTED *Cough* Mom*cough* Dad

Sally/Poseidon: Sorry perce

Percy: This year had been a year I will never forget; first off I get kidnapped by the goddess of marriage

Sally: *gives death glare at Hera*

Percy: BUT THEN, I Met Hazel Frank and CAMP JUPITER, SHOUT OUT TO THEM

Camp Jupiter: WHOOO

Percy: Soon after I reunite with Annabeth, my love

Annabeth: *blushes*

Percy: Then I meet the rest of my 'Golden Trio' Counter Parts; LEO AND PIPER

Leo/ Piper: Thanks Man

Percy: also that blonde idoit

Jason: F*ck you

Percy: f*ck you to

Artemis: *slaps Apollo* SEE WHAT YOU DID

Apollo: AINT MY FAULT THEY LISTEN TO ME BIT-

******_At This point Artemis has already tackled Apollo to the ground she's kicking ass as Apollo is screaming for help from anyone, like seriously Artemis is such a badass right now it needs to be put on TV. Okay so Zeus had just stopped it but Apollo needs medical attention right. So now Will is helping him but then Aphrodite acadantiely shot him with an arrow. But not just any arrow. A LOVE ARROW. AND OMG WILL IS IN LOVE WITH HIS DAD RIGHT NOW, LIKE HIS TRYING TO KISS HIM AND HUMP HIM AND STUFF BUT APOLLO IS JUST PUSHING HIM OFF ITS LIKE A DEMIGOD/GOD RAPE/PORN ON THE GROUND RIGHT NOW AND NO ONE IS HELPIMNG HIM CAUSE ITS WAY TO FUNNY. AND- AND RIGHT HEPFESTUS HAS JUST BROUGHT OUT THE CAMERA, LOL THIS IS GOLD. SORRY , ANYWAYS NO, DREW IS SO FUCKIBNG PISSED RIGHT NOW BECAUSE TURNS OUT SHE WAS SECRETLY DATEING WILL AND WILL JUST DUMPED HER FOR HIS DAD AND ROLF. OKAY SO NOW NICO HAS TO BE A BADASS AND GET WILL IN CONTROL RIGHT NOW BUT DREW WANTS WILL TO LOVE HER AGAIN SO SHE TRIES TO SHOOT WILL BUT ACINDENTLY SHOOTS NICO AND NOW NICO IS IN LOVE WITH WILL. AND HADES IS JUST MESSED UP WATCHING HIS SON TRING TO FUCK A BOY WHO IS IN LOVE WITH HIS DAD. OKAY NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE ORIGINAL BADASS TO COME AND STOP BEFORE SOMEONE TAKES THERE PANTS OFF. YOU GO ARTEMIS YOU GO, I SWEAR APOLLO IS SO SCARRED RIGHT NOW_******

Apollo: *rocks in seat back and forth*

Apollo: I'm emotionally and mentally scarred for life right now, and that's a long time since I'm a god

Everyone: *Looks at Aphrodite*

Aphrodite: I SAID I WAS SORRY, GEEZ REALAX

Artemis: my nephew tried to rape his farther, sorry won't fix it Hun

Hades: SO MUCH SASS RIGHT NOW

Drew: you really messed up mother

Aphrodite; weren't you not the one who shot Nico

Drew: Nico was already gay for him anyways, no bigger

Poseidon: CAN WE JUST PLEASE LET MY SON FINISHS HIS SPEECH

Everyone: Alright

Percy: As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted *looks at Jason*

Percy: It's been one hell of year, with these crazy kids

Sally: *drink water *

Percy: Frist I get kidnapped by Nica and Hazel, forced to eat bananas while watching them dance to creepy music while I get hanged above the portal to the worst part of the underworld

Sally: *spits out water * WHAT

Percy: YEAH IKR, SHOUT OUT TO NICA AND HAZEL

Hazel: Thanks Man, illy

Nico: I JUST WANT WILL TO LOVE ME LIKE I LOVE HIM. STUPID APOLLO TAKEING HIM AWAY FROM ME *Cries*

Apollo: TAKE HIM, MY KID'S MESSED UP CAUSE OF APHRODITE

Aphrodite: FORGIVE AND FORGET

Apollo: but you see there's a problem with that I CANT FUCKING FORGET

Artemis: *slaps Apollo* LANGUAGE

Percy: ILLY TO HAZE, NOT ONLY DID HAZEL DO THAT SHE BEACOME A TYRANT THAT EVERYONE WAS AFRAID OF. MAN, HADES YOU SHOULD BE PROUD

Hades: I Am

Sally: YOU'RE JOKEING RIGHT

Percy: No Mom, this actually happened. Okay Then WE ALL THOUGHT JASON WAS GAY FOR A BIT

Zeus: YOU'RE GAY

Jason: NO IM NOT, WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK THAT

Jason: IS IT BECAUSE OF IM UNMANLY BLONDENESS

Leo: OR IS IT THE WAY THAT HE RUNS-

Percy: I'm getting to that

Percy: OKAY THEN WE FOUND OUT LEO GOT SOME SINGNG POWERS FROM THE APOLLO CABIN SHOUT OUT TO THEM

Apollo Cabin: Can you not, were already embarrassed

Percy: WHATEVER, SO WE ALL START SINGING A FROZEN SONG RIGHT THEN WERE IN A CHRUCH CORRDIDER AND I CANT HELP BUT TO HEAR, NO I CANT HELP TO HEAR

Apollo; AN EXCHANGEING OF WORDS

Leo: *sings* I love you, I love you

Annabeth: NOT RIGHT NOW

Percy: SO THEN JASON AND PIPER GET MARRIED

Zeus: WHAT

Reyna: Don't worry I wasn't invited either

Percy: OKAY AFTER THAT SHIT GET PRETTY CRAZY

Sally: please no

Percy: ME AND ANNABETH ARE FIGHTING TO BE GROVER BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND

Sally: NO

Grover: sadly it's true

Percy: YES, BUT GROVER WAS A WUSS AND JUMPED OVER BOARD, THEN I GET TURNED INTO A GOSHT BY THANTOS, SHOUT OUT TO THANTOS AND GROVER

Grover: Hi *waves hand*

Thantos: *mutters to self-* I can't wait to collect all your souls

Sally: YOU DIED

Percy: YASS MOM, THEN I PRANKED LEO BY GOING IN THE BATHROOM WHILE HE WAS TAKEING A SHIT RIGHT, OMG ANNABETH GOT MARRIED TO A POLE THAT DAY

Athena: YOU WHAT

Annabeth: Percy that was hazels dream! REMEMBER

Percy: Oh yeah, cause she was the only one who didn't take the pot and get high and remembers everything that happened

Sally: YOU TOOK POT

Percy: JASON THEN GOT ME MARRIED TO NICO

Sally: I think I'm going to faint

Percy: THEN I GOT MARRIED TO JASON AGAIN

Percy: OMGS I ALMOST FORGOT SOMETHING

Sally: What is it?

Percy: I LISTENTEND TO CALEO PORN TOO, WHAT AN AMAZING YEAR IVE HAD WITH THESE PEOPLE WHO ARE MORE THEN FRIENDS TO ME BUT FAMILY. I LOVE ALL OF YOU SO MUCH. Except Jason. Jason can die for all I care

Jason: same goes for you dick head

Sally: THAT'S IT, PERCY YOUR COEMING HOME WITH ME AND PAUL

Everyone: WHAT

Sally: it's clearly not a good idea for him to be there

Sally: I mean did you hear all those things; he got married twice to two men

Nico: *gives sally death glare*

Sally: not that there's a problem with gays, cause there isn't

Sally: Pack your bags Percy were leaving after you aniversy dinner with Annabeth tonight

Percy: IT'S OUR ANIVERSARY

Piper: *hands Leo a twenty*

Annabeth: Knew this would happened

Sally: Okay good, get Thaila or Nico to take your place

Poseidon: That's not how things work-

Sally: Things wouldn't have to work like this if he had a farther

Sally; but that's not my place to judge

Sally; OH WAIT IT IS

Hades: ITS IT ME OR IS THE SASS LEVEL A BIT TO HIGH IN HEAR

Reyna: it's just you

Octivanto: Hey Reyna, the Auguries said that 'You're a Jealous Bitch' but you didn't hear that from me

Reyna: Why you piece of-

Octavian: Hot stuff, why thank you Reyna but you're not my type

Reyna: I will

Octavian: seduce me to like you, Reyna I'm faltered but no

Reyna: f*ck you

Hades: SASS LEVEL IS SO HIGH, I CAN SWIM IN IT WHOO

* * *

**IM SORRY FOR ANY SPELLING MISTAKES OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT I WAS RUSHING. OKAY**

**ALSO DID YOU GUYS HERE ABOUT THE LOUISVILLE PURGE, THAT WAS HILARIOUS**

**WELL BY FOR NOW**

**LOVE YA**

_**Sass on everyone**_

_**~Divergentdemigods**_


	42. To All: If You Could Switch Boddies

**To the Seven: If you had to switch bodies with someone else for a week, who would it be?-permalec**

Frank: . . .

Frank:. . . .

Frank: didn't we already do this before, because I swear to the gods we did this before

Leo: nope, I don't remember ever doing this

Frank: you sure, you guys are messing with me right?

Hazel: No franky, we aren't

Frank: okay if you say so

Percy: I WOULLD SWITCH BODIES WITH CALYPSO

Leo: why her?

Percy: cause she has her own private Island

Percy: Do YOU have an island

Leo: well no, but i-

Percy: *puts hand up* case closed peasant

Leo: Rude

Frank: You sure we haven't done this before

Everyone: YES!

Nico: No One, cause no one deserves me in there bodies *wears crown*

Piper: Except for Will

Nico: SHUT UP SECONED PLACE

Piper: Whaat, it's the truth

Nico: YOU KNOW ITS WAS CAUSE OF YOUR STUPID SISTER SHIT HAPPENED

Drew: FORGIVE AND FORGET

Piper: You wike him

Nico: I do not 'wike' him

Piper: Mhhh

Nico: Besides, he's dating your mistake of a sister

Drew: So it missed, GET OVER IT

Nico: DON'T YOU THINK IVE TRIED, IVE HAD SESSIONS WITH LEO TO GET OVER IT

Calypso: who gave you that dumb idea to see Leo

Nico: You did

Calypso: It's called sarcasm

Nico: WHATEVER

Piper: Solangelo or Willico

Nico: Neither

Nico: Also I think your forgetting he's dating your SISTER

Will: Actually, she broke up with me three days later, after the you know 'event'

Nico: Oh wow

Nico: that…that is something

Piper: Do I HEAR WEDDING BELLS

Leo: *Plays bells*

Nico: NO, GO TO HELL

Piper: Aww, c'mon you know you love us

Leo: Yeah buddy

Nico: GO LIE IN A DITCH AND LEAVE ME BE

Jason: YEAH YOU GUYS, LEAVE HIM ALONE

Nico: Thank You

Jason: HE DOESN'T NEED WILL, HE NEEDS PERCY!

Nico: Fuck you too grace

Nico: I hope you die while flying

Nico: so everyone can see what a failure you are

Jason:#idcIWillShipPernicoTillTheEnd

Nico: GOODBYE

…

**Hi….**

**Im Sorry….**

**Bye….**

_**Sass On Everyone**_

_**-DivergentDemigods**_


	43. To Frank: Can Percy Do Things To You?

To: Frank, If you transformed into a horse can Percy force you to do anything?- Colinpop5

Frank:*moves away from Percy*

Leo: BAHAHAHAHAHA

Percy: I feel uncomfortable with this

LEO: I BET FRANK DOES TOO, WHEN-

Percy/Frank: SHUT UP VALDEZ

Leo: OH GOD, I JUST CAME UP WITH THE BEST SHIP NAME

Leo: FRANCY! HOWS ABOUT THAT

Frank: Is there a rope anywhere, I may need to use it

Leo: Why? So Percy can tie you up? *Falls on the ground

Jason: The only person Percy's tying up is Nico

Piper: OR Annabeth

Annabeth: please, I wish to stay out of this madness

Percy: Same

Frank: Me Three

Leo: I HAVE A QUESTION

Frank/Percy/Annabeth: NO

Leo: Percy: who rides you better? Frank or Annabeth

Percy: I rather not say

Leo: SO YOU'VE BEEN GETTING IT ON WITH FRANKY BOY

Percy: NO, My sex life should be private

Percy: Not everyone needs to know

Jason: YEAH

Percy: Thank you

Jason: AND IT'S NICO WHO RIDES HIM

Percy: WHAT?!

Jason: Idoits don't even know who's dating who

Nico: *looks for gun* Okay, WHO TOOK MY GUN?

Piper: Listen here losers; Annabeth is most likely best at this

Annabeth: I thought I said for you to LEAVE ME OUT

Piper: let's all be realistic here

Jason: But Percy and Nico have that famine and male thing going for them

Jason: Like, just look at how girly Nico is

Piper/Leo: *considers thought*

Nico: I am a guy, boy, male

Nico: so STOP CONSIDERING THE FACT OF ME BEING THE GIRL

Everyone: *ignores Nico*

Leo: Yeah, but Frank can turn into animals

Leo: Think of how kinky that is

Frank: NICO, I THINK I FOUNF YOUR GUN

Frank: CAN I USE IT

Piper: True, but Annabeth's a genius

Piper: think of all the kinky things she probably come up with

Annabeth: STOP TALKING ABOUT MY SEX LIFE

Annabeth: UGHH, Nico I'm using the gun after frank

Nico: Whatever

Jason: BUT, NICOS SADDIST, HE CAN PROBOLY MAKE PERCY DO THINGS IN BED AND-

Jason: Where's Percy?

Frank: *about to pull trigger* I have no idea *put gun down*

Nico: Specking of that *looks around the room* Where Hazel?

Everyone in the room: *thinks* Shit

Jason: My Gods, what have we done

Leo: She's going to kill him

Piper: *holds Annabeth* I'm so Sorry,

Nico: I feel like this is my fault

Frank: don't worry Nico, it's not your fault

Frank: Its LEO'S

Leo: WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH

Leo: WOAH

Frank: YOU KNOW WHATS SHES LIKE WHEN SHES MAD

Leo: YEAH, BUT SHE BARELY COMES TO THESE THINGS ANYMORE

Leo: HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW

Annabeth: I told all of you to shut up, but no one listens

Annabeth: and now he might be dead

Leo: Annabeth, I'm sorry I-

Jason: WAIT LOOK OVER THERE *Points outside the door to main level*

Percy: Umm, thanks Haze I didn't know you could cook

Hazel: Don't worry about it, it's my specialty I used make them all the time in New Orleans

Percy: *reaches for a cookie*

Jason: PERCY NO

The seven plus Nico: *runs outside*

Leo: *flips tray out of hazels hands*

Nico: *shoots cookies with gun*

Coach Hedge: DIE DIE DIE

Annabeth: when did he get here- you know what, who cares

Hazel: What the heck you guys

Percy: Yeah, Hazel made those cookies especially for me

Piper: Percy, can't you see?

Percy: See what?

Jason: *sighs* she's trying to poison you

Hazel: *tears form in eyes* why would I do that?

Leo: Cause you overheard the conversation back in the room over there

Hazel: You Guys, I was in the kitchen all day with Coach baking cookies for Percy

Annabeth: Sure *rolls eyes*

Calypso: She was, I was with her *eats cookie*

Coach Hedge: You guys are just real duochebags

Hazel: *cries into frank's shirt*

Frank: Come on let go and leave these jerks

Frank/Hazel/Coach/Percy/Calypso: *leaves*

Annabeth: Wasn't frank with us - you know what, no one cares

Piper: now I feel so bad, she probably hates us now

Jason: yeah me too, you know you couldn't been nicer about it Leo

Nico: great, now I need to do something to make her feel better

Nico: Thanks Leo *walks away*

Leo: Yeah, lets all blame the short guy

* * *

**Hi Everyone**

**I Saw MockingJay Part 1and it was awesome**

**So Bye**


End file.
